Can you have a primary residence in MD and secondary in DE and receive Medicaid in the secondary residence?

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I am a full-time caregiver to my mom who is a homeowner with a mortgage living in Maryland---I work in DE and driving over 2 hours round trip a day to take her to daycare and then off to work. There are not many job opportunities in MD where we live and the local medical daycare is open from 8a to 2p---so we need to keep doing as we are currently. We are paying out of pocket for daycare and can no longer afford. There is a waiting list in MD for Medicaid waiver but no waiting list in DE. I want to sell her house and move to DE as she has a mortgage but the family wants to keep the house. Is it possible for us to have a secondary residence in DE so that she can receive Medicaid waiver and allow us daycare assistance and possible home health and respite. I am employed as a home health aide and would like to be able to work more hours in the evening and be in DE near where I work, but take her to her home on the weekends. Not sure what to do and how we would afford 2 households. Any advice greatly appreciated! She has Medicare but I only want the Medicaid waiver for community services.

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Found a 1BR (I will sleep on the sofa lol) for $500 month...just can't take our Chihuahua since no pets but the point is I did find one in my price range in a decent neighborhood 5 miles from her daycare in DE and closer to my brother which means help for me...and I may just have to do it without the Medicaid since that seems to be just a little complicated so Medicare will suffice for now. In either case seems obvious I will have to consult an elder law attorney to figure this all out.
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Hmmm...I will ask the social worker about all of this. I can't do anything in DE until I move back there. I did live there before my mom fell ill and I want to go back. I want to take care of her but I cannot give up my life to do it. I love my childhood home but I had my own place once like most grown adults do. The way I understood it from DE social services is that if my mom is with me under my care I can apply for services---it is not an issue that she has a home in MD and she does not have to change her primary residence. I am currently paying $400 month daycare and about $300 in gas---which will no longer be paid out if we can get Medicaid waiver and I am closer to work---this can go towards rent. I am a home health aide and all of my DE patients have it. We will still be living in my mom's house 4 days a week, but it will be her address, not mine. She has tons of clothes and equipment that I can split between her house and mine. The electric bill will be reduced since not in MD full time and not in DE full time---no cable or phone needed in DE apartment---just a place to lay our heads until I am off from work and can take her home. I work 4 days so she can have 3 days home. Very nice neighborhood that her house will be safe until we get back. Looking for an apartment on ground level so I can get her in and out. We can get more rest and not have to get up at 4a for work and daycare. The daycare bus can even pick her up if she is in DE. My brother lives in DE and can help me and she may also qualify for home health aides so I can work a few hours in the evenings. Will not be easy but unless DE social services tells me impossible I will have to try. I will have to see what the pros and cons are and glad that I talked with you guys so that I know what questions to ask. I really appreciate this forum so much:)
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In agreement with Igloo, who is really knowledgeable about this topic.
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To say nothing of all that equipment and paraphanalia that Mom requires. Double up on the clothing and disposibles. Remembering her meds at both homes. Will the apartment management allow you to install a ramp to get her wheelchair-bound self to the car that is parked--where? Not in the garage. Maybe they'll let you reserve one by the door, maybe not. I don't envy you at all. Working all those hours to pay rent, utilities, and somehow $20.00/day daycare has morphed into a $700.00 debt to be paid. Maybe I misread that. But still. You don't just throw a Hoyer lift in the backseat and carry it back and forth. Good luck!
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V - although it sounds just fabulous that mom even though she has a home in MD can get DE Medicaid, to me it seems that financially the math doesn't work.

All the costs on the MD home including the mortgage still MUST be paid. If she moves to DE there will be a change of address. The MD homestead exemption for her more than likely is toast. Property tax reductions & payment plans for elderly & disabled are pretty generous. All that goes away & the city/state will find out. The old $600 tax bill could morph to $ 4,000. Homeowner insurance could need to change to vacant dwelling policy -these are somewhat expensive and very narrow on coverage. If she moves and does not notify the insurer and there is a big claim, they will not pay as policy was not in effect. The mortgage requires full insurance or shes in default for loan terms. Also Utilities, yard, repairs all still have to be paid for. Again more $. Her income is fixed at $ 2500. Can she afford 2 households? Yes you will find a job, but realistically how much can you take home after taxes? If you are on ACA low income the premium is being subsidized. Once you start working that and other income "at need" benefits will stop. What is a realistic rent & what up front costs to move in? You mentioned $ 500 a month is your budget. I just cannot imagine what kind of hovel $ 500 could rent for you and a disabled parent....

Really look at the probable increased costs to run 2 households. Please!. If you are going in every weekend to MD, you can't just shut off the power, cover furniture with sheets, pull closed the shutters and seal the house up. You are going to be running & paying for two fully in use households. Most folks in the US just cannot afford a second home.

Also clearly find out IF DE allows the waiver only because there is the agreement or understanding that the out of state property will be sold with the proceeds used to pay towards current or future care provided by DE. Usually this has a set time limit of 6 mos but can be renewed to a year with property listed by Realtor so there's a MLS agreement & # on the property.
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Update: Great News---just found out that if (I) move back to DE we can still keep mom's house in MD and apply for Medicaid Waiver in DE since I am her caregiver who would be living and working in DE---while she is under my care in DE. Now the hard part is finding an affordable apartment. No more driving us over 2 hours round trip a day. Just take her home to MD on the weekends so she can enjoy her home and everybody is happy:)
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I was only applying for health benefits, but when I put in all the household info it said I qualified for medical assistance. After I entered my mom's info it said she did not qualify for assistance (even though I was not asking for her at the time, but had to put in her income). This pretty much tells me that she will not qualify for state assistance unless she become ill enough for longterm care.
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And Pam I was surprised to be able to get benefits as well since I did have to put my mom down for household income. I went to the Healthcare.Gov website and applied after I lost my health insurance because I could no longer work the required hours to keep the benefits. When my income goes back up I lose the benefit, but covered as long as I earn under 16000 per year. I want to work full time again and get my benefits back as I have always been self sufficient and would like to keep it that way.
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I agree and right now don't even know if she qualifies for Medicaid because I have not applied for the reasons you have outlined. She has always had Aetna Medicare from her employer she retired from and she can choose a doctor in any state---she worked in DE which is why her docs are there. Most of the people who live in the town we live in work in DE since relatively close and not many job opportunities here. I did not want Medicaid to replace her Aetna Medicare---only wanted to apply for Medicaid waiver 1915c---which covers community services to assist with staying out of the nursing home such as daycare and home health aides. And yes---driving me crazy and causing me sleepless nights. My plan was to allow her income to continue to pay for her home in MD and for me to afford my own apartment in DE where we can stay during the week for work---problem is finding an apartment for no more than $500 a month.
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Sharing a home in DE will only help if she sells the house in MD. I am surprised that MD is paying you benefits, usually they consider the entire household income.
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