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LisaLA Asked January 1, 2026

How to clean father's bottom and genital area when he has fecal incontinence.

He is mobile and current procedure is for him to stand up while I clean him up. Difficulty is getting all nooks and crannies and hairy "delicates."

Hothouseflower Jan 25, 2026
I drew the line at toileting with my parents. Refused to do it. The aides needed to take care of it. I don’t expect my daughter to do it for me.
JoAnn29 Jan 26, 2026
My daughter is an RN and before that an LPN. She has already told me she would not be doing that for me. She has cleaned up enough people for a lifetime.
Credulous Jan 25, 2026
OMG! As much as I dread that diarrhea clean up for my husband I can’t begin to imagine doing that for a parent. My husband has 2-3 weekly and it’s my worst nightmare. He may have been sitting in it for an hour or so if I’ve been at a Dr appt or grocery shopping and has dried up somewhat. At least since we started using UnderX pull-ups there is never any leakage and it’s easy to pull them down and off without mishap. I use kitchen gloves and xtra large wipes, finishing with scrubz disposable rinse free sudsy cloths. I spray the gloves after use with germicide disinfectant and hang to dry.

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JoAnn29 Jan 5, 2026
Me, I don't do toileting and the clean up well. One reason I placed Mom was for this reason.

Susaneleanor Jan 4, 2026
we have one its called a Tushie and connects into the toilet flush system, you just turn it on and sluice the area that needs it and you are done

AlvaDeer Jan 1, 2026
For certain, if you are doing this kind of total care in home, a bidet is truly crucial at this point. I want to wish you best of luck.
LisaLA Jan 4, 2026
Thank you for your advice, it's the #1 answer, however, the arrangement of his bathroom does not allow for a second person to be near the toilet except for directly in front of it ("water closet" arrangement). It could possibly work but what i really need is specific advice for cleaning his ANATOMICAL parts and the difficulties that go with it.
Geaton777 Jan 1, 2026
Costco sells a Toto Washlet bidet that has a 4.7 star rating.

lealonnie1 Jan 1, 2026
Get a bidet hook up for the toilet.

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