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Barb57 Asked October 21, 2025

My elderly brother lives with us. He had a catastrophic traumatic brain injury many years ago.

Now, he has expressive/receptive aphasia. He was walking our dog and urinated in what he thought was the woods.He has visual field cuts (no vision in right eye, no peripheral vision and a field cut in his left eye). I explained this to the police. One officer said"well, he could have turned his head to get a look". Our neighbor saw him and called the police. Without speaking with him, police charged him with "open and gross lewdness" and told him he would have to register as a sex offender if convicted. They said all of this OUTSIDE and many neighbors overheard. Now, rumors are spreading that he is a "sex offender:. I apologized to the neighbor and explained his TBI and dementia. She would not listen and banned me from her property. Tomorrow is my brother's hearing. I wrote to the magistrate explaining his severe cognitive decline. I also told the police this. They would not listen. They NEVER spoke with my brother--only to me and my husband. Any advice? He is known as a very gentle and kind soul in our town. The police are not that educated. I appreciate any advice.

JustAnon Oct 26, 2025
Get him placed in an appropriate facility ASAP.

MACinCT Oct 26, 2025
Do realize if he gets sex offender status on his police record that facilities have a right to refuse admission. Do get him in sooner rather than later

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AlvaDeer Oct 23, 2025
So, Barb this has worked as a warning, hasn't it?
You mentioned the TBI but you also mention dementia.
It must be clear to you now that your brother cannot move about his world unaccompanied? Don't you think? What plans have you regarding this, as it will become more and more a problem.

AMZebbC Oct 23, 2025
I am glad the charges were dismissed. However, what provisions have or will you take to prevent this from occuring again? Hopefully there will not be a next time. And, if there is, please be aware it may not be dismissed due to a pattern without appropriate changes. Or, god forbid, it happens with children present.

notgoodenough Oct 22, 2025
While I am sorry for your brother's diagnosis, and from your description of the event the police response was disproportionate to the violation, I have to say (and I'm sure I will get some flak about this) if I were in your neighbor's shoes, I would be most unhappy if someone came onto my property and relieved him/herself on my property within my view, regardless of their health issues. My home is my sanctuary, and I don't want it being used as someone else's outdoor toilet.

PeggySue2020 Oct 22, 2025
If he can’t understand that he can’t pull his penis out in public, it is time for him to not only quit walking the dog but also to be supervised only in public.

JoAnn29 Oct 22, 2025
Glad they were dismissed. I would think a Doctor letter would have cleared things up. It looks like to me your brother is at a stage he should not be wandering outside. You may have to eventually place him.

MG8522 Oct 22, 2025
Thank you for the update, Barb. I'm very relieved for you.

SnoopyLove Oct 22, 2025
Barb, so glad to read your update that the charges have been dismissed!

Rosered6 Oct 21, 2025
I agree with you that the charges should be dismissed. But it might not be. That's why I suggest hiring a lawyer.
Barb57 Oct 22, 2025
Charges dismissed this morning!!
Rosered6 Oct 21, 2025
I don't know how the legal system works where you live. If you were in the U.S., I'd tell you to hire a lawyer for your brother immediately.
Barb57 Oct 21, 2025
I live in the US. Hearing is tomorrow. I know they violated Title II of the Americans with Disabilities Act. We do not have a lawyer as this should be dismissed. If you talked with my brother, you'd IMMEDIATELY know he has dementia. How the police can be so cruel is beyond me I will go to the media if they do not dismiss charges. They literally did NOT even attempt to converse with my brother!

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