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ariamor13 Asked July 2022

Where do I even start? Please share your tips and suggestions.

Hi everyone, I am a 29-year-old living in New York caring for my mom who is in her mid-80s. She tested COVID positive, and everything seemed to get worse from there. She slowly became very fatigued to the point I took her to the ER. They found she had a small heart attack and a UTI which was causing delusions and hallucinations. Scariest thing in my life.



I am a licensed master social worker, and I am currently on a leave from work to care for my mother. I am just looking for a space of support and helpful tips or advice. This is the scariest thing ever and I went through my father's heart disease and ultimately death. I wish you all well on your caregiving journeys.

Grandma1954 Jul 2022
You start by looking for resources that will help you.
Area Agency on Aging may have programs that can assist.
Your local Senior Center may also be aware of programs.
IF your mom is a Veteran the VA may provide some services that would help.
Caring for someone is not a 1 person job.
Hiring caregivers if she can not be left alone is an option.
Looking for Adult Day programs is a great way to get her involved with others, social stimulation. (follow guidelines re COVID)

The scary thing is that you are realizing that she is frail, she will be reaching the end of her life. Most 29 year old's do not think about that.
And with there may not be the full recovery to her baseline prior to the COVID, the UTI and the heart attack.
If she needs medication for anxiety, hallucinations and they are controlled by meds, great.
The thing that YOU need to decide is....
Can you be a full time caregiver if she needs it. I am betting the answer to that is no.
So you have to consider options.
Caregivers that some in and care for her.
Assisted Living. (If she refuses you can not "force" her)

Now...do you have POA? Who is responsible if she can not make decisions for herself? A consultation with an Elder Care attorney can help sort out a lot.

Geaton777 Jul 2022
What's your most pressing concern in caring for your mom right now?

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vegaslady Jul 2022
Does your employment have a benefit such as Employee Assistance Program? You might want to take advantage of the professional advice that could be avsilto you.

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