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Sammybucca123 Asked April 2022

My dad was a bully to us growing up. Any advice?

lealonnie1 Apr 2022
And my mom was a bully growing up too. What's your point?

AlvaDeer Apr 2022
Hi Sammy:
I will weigh in as the "bad guy" here.
Firstly I am so sorry for your experience of growing up with a bully. Often, someone who is a bully "grooms" his (or her) children to be frightened, to serve without question. If this is the case for you, do consider seeking out some professional help to be able to protect yourself now.
But most importantly:
I don't "do" bullies of any kind. I simply avoid them. That would include any who were "blood relations".
We teach people who we are by what we allow them to get by with in our presence. If we allow their bad behavior, it isn't good for us and it isn't good for them.
I wish you the very best. Consider allowing the State to assume guardianship of your Dad. They will give him much more loving care than he gave you. Then move on with your own life.
We have two chances at family. The one we are born into and the one we make for ourselves.
Very best of luck to you.

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Geaton777 Apr 2022
Your profile says: "I am caring for my father Richard , who is 81 years old, living at home with alzheimer's / dementia, arthritis, hearing loss, incontinence, mobility problems, parkinson's disease, urinary tract infection, and vision problems." Caring for someone now who bullied you in the past is beyond difficult. Many others on this forum have been in your shoes (and still are). You can ask your question here and get support from others who understand exactly what you're going through.

97yroldmom Apr 2022
Sammybucca123

Sorry about your dad.

Did you have a question for the forum?

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