103 year old mother wants to live with 76 year old daughter (moving from granddaughter’s house). How do we have this conversation?
How to have conversation that it may be best for 103 year old mother to live in independent care facility ( yes, she is quite independent)! with several hours of private care? Other option is for full time caregiver.
She is not independent if she needs a caregiver for several hours. Independent means she can do all her ADLs without help.
Why is this woman with a granddaughter and not the daughter? I agree that if 76 yr old cannot care for her and its too much for the granddaughter, time for an AL. In cost of an IL facility and caregivers several hours a day, the cost will be as much as an AL. No need to worry about caregivers not showing up or having to be replaced.
You say, I'm sorry mom but having a roommate at my age simply will not work for me. I love you and I'd like to maintain our great relationship intact, so I'll be happy to help you find a great place to live in any senior living place of your choice.
It's just that simple, really.
The question is, if she's so 'independent' at 103 years old, why does she need a full time caregiver? It would be a whole lot cheaper for her to live in Assisted Living and get care as needed!
If she is cognizant, independent what conversation do you want to have? And if the mother is "independent" what do you anticipate the private care person will do? Or the fulltime caregiver? You can suggest that BOTH move to Independent Living or Assisted Living if that is what would be best for both of them. In Assisted Living there would be no need to the expense of a part time or full time caregiver.
There is not much information in your profile so not sure if you are talking about a client or your own family member. If it is a client then it is the families decision as a professional you can give your UNBIASED input. If it is a family member I would opt for Assisted Living rather than Independent Living. And I would try to get the daughter to make the move as well. they would be companions and be able to help each other out as they can but would have staff that could step in if needed.
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Why is this woman with a granddaughter and not the daughter? I agree that if 76 yr old cannot care for her and its too much for the granddaughter, time for an AL. In cost of an IL facility and caregivers several hours a day, the cost will be as much as an AL. No need to worry about caregivers not showing up or having to be replaced.
It's just that simple, really.
The question is, if she's so 'independent' at 103 years old, why does she need a full time caregiver? It would be a whole lot cheaper for her to live in Assisted Living and get care as needed!
Good luck.
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What does the 76 year old daughter want to do? Is she willing to have her mother move in with her?
You can suggest that BOTH move to Independent Living or Assisted Living if that is what would be best for both of them. In Assisted Living there would be no need to the expense of a part time or full time caregiver.
There is not much information in your profile so not sure if you are talking about a client or your own family member.
If it is a client then it is the families decision as a professional you can give your UNBIASED input.
If it is a family member I would opt for Assisted Living rather than Independent Living. And I would try to get the daughter to make the move as well. they would be companions and be able to help each other out as they can but would have staff that could step in if needed.