Should I step in and try and make peace between 85 year old sister and 83 year old carer husband after they had physical fight?

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mandyricepuding Asked October 2020

Should I step in and try and make peace between 85 year old sister and 83 year old carer husband after they had physical fight?

My sister is crippled with arthritis and her hubby cooks, cleans etc,, They have money but she will not allow any help. She is now totally self centered and hates if dozes in his chair or goes on his computer. She attacked him with a knife last week and he punched her. Police were called and she was taken to hospital for assessments, pyschiatric and social. She passed both.. I am going to stay to try and work out what to do. Advice please.

Abusive Relationship Relationships Violent Behavior

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score 0 · Answer 1

There is something wrong here. For his safety, he needs to leave.

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score 2 · Answer 2

How do you know she "passed" the cognitive exam? Did she tell you? Or the doctor who performed it? I'd start by verifying this is even true. Do you have durable PoA for either of them? Does anyone? If not, your only recourse is to call APS and someone pursues guardianship. Testing for UTI would be useful (and somewhat easier) to discount it as the source of the problem.

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score 1 · Answer 3

Are you sure that you want to stay in a home with your sister who tries to stab her husband with a knife? Stay out of her way! I’d be afraid of being next!!!

If I were him I would have moved out already. She is dangerous.

I feel for all of you. Let me ask you. Did the psychiatrist put her on meds? Just curious, how long was she observed?

Did she have any medical conditions such as an UTI that could have set her off like that?

Again, I am sorry that you are dealing with this mess. You must be exhausted! How is her husband holding up?

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Should I step in and try and make peace between 85 year old sister and 83 year old carer husband after they had physical fight?

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