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MLB06X Asked September 2020

Should DFACS/ Elderly care be notified?

I have a friend who is attempting to care for his elderly, 95 year old mother. Recently the electricity was cut off at his residence (where he currently provides care for his mother) and, long story short, he is in the stage where he keeps the electricity on in sections of the house via gas generator. I know his mother has some cancer (don't know what stage) and she has machines that seem to be utilized to maintain her health. I've known my friend since childhood, knows that he loves his mother, but I don't think he is fully aware that he can no longer care for his mother at his home. His finances seem to be exhausted and some of his relatives may be taking advantage of him. Question: Do I need to contact my local Department of Family and Children Services or Elderly care organization? Thanks in advance for your answers.

ToniFromRVA Sep 2020
Since he is your friend reach out to him & see what he needs help with. Encourage him to contact Social Services to see what assistance he can receive for himself +/or his mom. They can give or connect him with resources to help with electricity, food, etc. He needs to live safely. Maybe call your local fire station & ask about the safety of gas generators. If one of his machines is oxygen then he can contact mom's doctor to get the O2 company to deliver tanks to use that don't require electricity.

AlvaDeer Sep 2020
You describe this person as a "friend". Have you gone to your friend to ask about these things? That would be my first inclination. If not, why not? If so, what was the response. To me that would tell all about the next step in this matter.

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JoAnn29 Sep 2020
Yes, if she is on machines she needs to keep alive, I don't think they can turn the electric off. APS maybe able to help with resources. Medicaid can help with homecare if income of Mom is low.

gladimhere Sep 2020
Yes. Adult Protective Services. Area Agency on Aging, utility company they have programs that will pay utility bills.

Countrymouse Sep 2020
Yes, contact them. How can it possibly hurt to get their advice?

YoungCare Sep 2020
It sounds like your friend might need help too. His thinking isn't exactly right. They might both need help.
YoungCare Sep 2020
I don't mean to insinuate anything. Sorry, I just mean if you're friend is using a gas generator instead of applying for assistance or seeing to the needs of his mom, that it isn't a logic thought process. Maybe it is, if they live in the mountains or somewhere remote, but in the city it wouldn't be safe or long term solutions for that. I should've been more clear and careful in my answer and I hope I didn't offend you. Either way, he might need help caring for his mom and they both need help with the energy/light issue and maybe other needs for daily living. I hope you can help your friend and if not, take care of yourself.
SnoopyLove Sep 2020
I would. Generators are extremely dangerous. Perhaps there are programs that could help your friend with the electric bill, as well as other services. Your friend may be totally overwhelmed and not thinking clearly.

I would call so that he could get additional help in general, and to put a stop to a potentially very dangerous situation.

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