How to approach senior living when my mom is scared of it?
My mom lives alone but has a caretaker checking in. She has early stages of dementia (9 years in). I want to approach it kindly - she also thinks I’m already telling her what to do. I don’t live in the same town.
I would approach it with honesty, that it is no longer safe to remain alone. That while this isn't what anyone WANTS she may be surprised to find that she likes it, that the activities, visiting and care are good for her. Treat it as sort of a "the doctor thinks that...." Or "We have to give this a try....." Quite honestly you just cannot fix everything, nor make it palatable and nice. Sometimes it is just one more sad fact of life.
Maybe she equates senior living with nursing homes. Maybe she thinks she'll lose her independence. Maybe she thinks she'll have to share a room with someone. Maybe....? None of these is true. Or she may have other concerns. What are they? Does she own her home or does she rent? If she owns, the proceeds from the sale of the house can pay for the facility cost. Try to sell her on the benefits of senior living.
Senior living provides for meals (may or may not be included in the monthly fee), utility costs, housekeeping, cable TV, group activities, etc. She would have her own apt. and come and go as she pleases.
Having to deal with AD, however, sort of restricts her choices. A stand alone retirement community would not be good. A facility with independent living, AL and MC would be her best bet. Knowing her condition will worsen, she could easily move to the next level of care within the same facility.
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Senior living provides for meals (may or may not be included in the monthly fee), utility costs, housekeeping, cable TV, group activities, etc. She would have her own apt. and come and go as she pleases.
Having to deal with AD, however, sort of restricts her choices. A stand alone retirement community would not be good. A facility with independent living, AL and MC would be her best bet. Knowing her condition will worsen, she could easily move to the next level of care within the same facility.
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