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rustlingleaves Asked July 2019

Would love to hear how people handle dealing with all the household things, so much work to get rid of stuff, plus too many heirlooms.

Thanks.

Kimber166 Jul 2019
auction sale - and far too often the "heirlooms" are really not that

lealonnie1 Jul 2019
There is a company online called Everything But the House, EBTH.com. They handle online estate sales in California and several other states. They will come into the home with people and a truck, load it up, get it OUT of your sight, and sell it online to an international audience (which DOES make a big difference) and you can watch the auction in real time. They handle the sale, the shipping, everything FOR you. In turn, you give them a hefty portion of the proceeds, somewhere in the neighborhood of 45%, depending on how much you sell. They will not take everything, but then again, they are not just looking for Rembrandts and Van Gogh's. Check them out online & see what sorts of things they sell. You can contact them with questions, for prices, and to see if they'll come to your specific area.
Best of luck!

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rustlingleaves Jul 2019
Thanks all-I'm not alone-just have to share- I unearthed my great aunt Marjorie's velvet half cape from the 30's. Half of it is silver thread. The thing about silver thread is it tarnishes, arrrrg!:-)

anonymous912123 Jul 2019
Unfortunately, I have closed out 4 estates in the last 12 years. Talk about "Stuff". I tossed, gifted and donated. The gifting part was almost impossible to accomplish unless it was money or expensive jewelry, no one wanted the family heirlooms. Honestly, the end result was that the only things that had any real value was the paperwork, especially those pertaining to investments. Get a 30 yard dumpster, some large commercial leaf bags and toss, set stuff at the curb and forget about it, what can be donated, donate and take it as a donation off your tax return. Process the "Stuff" like you are working on an assembly line.

rustlingleaves Jul 2019
Thanks so much everyone-so helpful! Now I feel a little less overwhelmed, though it's all alot of work!

realtime Jul 2019
Frequent flyer --- Yes, one company made it clear that they were looking only for "high ticket" items and would not crawl around the attic. The company I went with wasn't as picky. I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't found them.

realtime Jul 2019
I don't think there's any perfect solution: when there are heirlooms or items of value, you have to get involved to some extent.

I went to several estate sales to see how they were organized, what prices things were going for, what items remained unsold at the end of the sale, and so on. Then I interviewed four estate sales companies and chose the one that came prepared to show me their licenses and permits, a sample contract, and recommendations.

Their services were invaluable. They analyzed the contents of the house (90 years of accumulation, house and three outbuildings), told me what there was a market for, recommended what to donate to an organization like Goodwill, recommended what to throw away. (They also called my attention to items they thought I should keep for family members.) They made sure my expectations as to price were reasonable --- people tend to overvalue beloved possessions.

Then they did the physical work of sorting through things (crawling around the attic on their hands and knees), pitching unsalable items into the dumpster, researching values when appropriate (we had many, many vintage collectibles), pricing and tagging everything, setting up the displays (using their own tables and racks to supplement what we had available), and conducting the sale. During the three-day sale they disposed of most of the stuff. They arranged for a local charity to choose what they could use from the leftovers, priced the donation for IRS purposes, got the receipt, and so on.

There were still things left that the charity didn't have demand for. We went over the stuff and decided what to throw away. Since I was still living locally, and had time, after the estate sale I advertised on Facebook Marketplace, and disposed of almost everything else, some of it at bargain prices, some of it free for "projects."

It's very, very important to be realistic about prices. I quickly learned that there's not much of a market for (for instance) fine antique china and sterling silver. People nowadays want dinnerware they can heat in the microwave and wash in the dishwasher. There are things that might find a buyer in a large metropolitan marketplace, but not in a small city or town. It's important to understand that not everything is suitable for an estate sale; some might go at a garage sale, but that's really a different market segment.

It's also important to know that the estate sales company takes a hefty share of the income, 35% to 45% --- which they definitely earn.

I really wish you the best. Saying goodbye to a family household is a wrenching experience. I was lucky to have found a really good estate seller, to have time to go through the process, and to be living where I could see to the long after-sale disposal process. But it was still exhausting and sad.
freqflyer Jul 2019
realtime, when I called around for estate sale people I didn't get any nibbles. Guess it varies from area to area.

Since my parent's paintings weren't original Van Gogh's nor any of the lovely antiques were from Buckingham Palace, they weren't interested.... [sigh].
anonymous901498 Jul 2019
I’ve spent the last three years cleaning out and downsizing. First I helped clean out my parents big house. Next was the family farm. Then helped my cousin Pam. After my husband died last summer all of his stuff. I gave to his children, grandchildren, and other family members. I bought a second house this past spring, so that took a good bit of my duplicate furniture. Now that I’ve remarried some plans have changed but nothing that will require a major downsizing. I found several church and library book sales to donate books, tapes and movies. Clothes donated to local charity store. Sold bunches of sports equipment and bicycles to Play It Again Sports. I was happy to see so much “stuff” gone.

Ahmijoy Jul 2019
When I cleaned out my mom’s apartment, I just found the determination (somewhere) and did it. I asked my daughter and SIL to come help one day and they were kind enough to.

If you have siblings, enlist their help. Give them the choice of “keep or toss”. If there are valuables that no one wants, they could be sold and the money go to the estate or into an account for long-term care if that is your situation. Furniture no one wants can be donated. The same with clothing.

Have plenty of supplies on hand. Stock up on trash bags, boxes of all sizes, packing tape, paper towels and cleaning supplies including brooms and dustpans.

If you find papers that could be important, including records, documents, certificates, etc., place them all in a box to look through at a later time. It’s easy to throw important papers out accidentally. I sat in my chair with file folders and a trash can and went through my mom’s papers. Luckily, Mom was a very good record keeper so it wasn’t difficult, but I didnt want to accidentally throw something away while under the stress of emptying out her apartment. The same goes for jewelry and pictures.

Good luck. It’s a difficult job, especially if your loved one has passed. But, it does eventually get done.

BarbBrooklyn Jul 2019
Took most to Goodwill (several trips a day in my trusty Honda Fit). Let the kids ( grandchildren) take what they wanted.

Oddly enough, I put some of the most sentimentally dear stuff at the curb. Watching cars screech to a halt, seeing happy folks cart away my mom's creche and some of her favorite vases was precious. These things were worth more than money. They needed love and they got them.
BlackHole Jul 2019
Good attitude!
freqflyer Jul 2019
rustingleaves, my sig other and I are knee deep in downsizing "stuff". I know it isn't easy, but think of it as having less stuff to dust :)

I was lucky regarding coins/stamps, my cousin has a grown son who collects coins and stamps because I was at my wits end wondering what to do with those items. What a relief it will go to someone who enjoys this hobby.

When it comes to heirlooms, that is really tough as the younger generation doesn't want knick knacks or doilies. But I know you want to give them a good home. In my area, the regional hospital has a Ladies Board which has a yearly rummage sale and they also have a thrift shop. Thus I know the items will be well cared for before they are sold.

Other "stuff" if I can't remember the history behind the item, I just donate it. I do have some really old things that I would like to find a museum that would take them to use in their period settings. Such as my Mom's wooden rocker cradle which is now over 100 year sold.
pamzimmrrt Jul 2019
I know what you mean about collections! My FIL collected stamps, and paid a pretty penny for a lot of them. When he tried to sell them.. zip! It seems in our area only other older men collect.. But my dads coins he sold did bring in some cash.. I still have a lot of them to deal with later, once mom passes. I just don't want to deal while she is still alive. None of the grandchildren are into this.

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