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Saritza Asked July 2018

Mother, dementia and cats. Any advice on what to do?

My mother is 87 years old with early dementia. My father died several years ago, due to his death she was feeling lonely and sad so I got her two kitties (she and cats live with me). She adores her pets but she keeps feeding human food to the cats, against the vet advice since they suffer from food allergies and can only eat prescribed cat food. I have spent a lot of money trying to keep the cats healthy but she continues feeding them the wrong food. They are showing again signs of allergies, not to mention that are overweight. She gets very defensive and lies about her behavior. The situation is very frustrating as I'm the one taking care of the cats as well, keep them nice and clean, keeping litter box clean, pays for vet, toys, food etc. I wish if she just could helping me by  stopping her behavior. I really don't know what to do. I will appreciate your inputs. Thank you.

Isthisrealyreal Jul 2018
I give good intentioned friends and family dog food and treats to share with my precious pooch. Some people can not resist so I avoid my anger and frustration by offering a healthy alternative.

I like the idea about making it moms responsibility for feeding her cats and lock them up at people meal times.

JoAnn29 Jul 2018
There's a similar thread about dogs.

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Ahmijoy Jul 2018
As someone who just gave my dog a piece of hamburger that I couldn’t finish (no onions) I kind of know how she feels.  But my dog doesn’t have allergies.

One solution is to put the kitties in another room whenever she eats. Don’t let them out until she’s finished and make sure she doesn’t pocket any food to feed them later. Sit with her while she eats. If she asks where the cats are, tell her they’re sleeping. Another solution might be to let her feed them their food. That would be her responsibility. She can monitor their bowls each day.

Telling her not to feed them won’t work. She sees it as her and the cats against you.

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