Are there independent social workers or individuals who work with families?

Well this sounds like a job for a therapist or counselor. The area on aging might be able to come in and evaluate your disabled friend and tell them the care that is needed or the condition he or she would need to be in before returning home but I'm not sure that will help the person accept it. The facility should have someone who is experienced with this or perhaps can recommend a counselor.

Sounds like you have already accepted the task.

I am assuming ur not a Social Worker. For Assisted Living they need to be able to pay privately approx $5K or more a month. For Medicaid they can have no assets other than a house and a car. Medicaid may help with home help. Try your county Office Aging to see what services they offer. Someone may be able to come and evaluate the situation.