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Vverdugo Asked September 2017

My 92-year-old mother always refuses to take a bath or shower. I am not sure what to do, any advice?

My sister and I are not sure what to do in this situation please help us.

GardenArtist Sep 2017
Grammy, you express a considerate method of adapting to care for someone in a way that doesn't trumatize her, as immersion showers can for older people.

Verdugo, you might also want to check out these posts from a search here on other posts on bathing.

https://www.agingcare.com/search.aspx?searchterm=alternatives%20to%20showers

Mom doesn't have to have a shower to keep clean. Dry rinse products allow her to remain dressed and they're much easier and less traumatic. I learned about them through rehab and hospital stays.

Some caregivers turn a "dry bathing" session into a bonding experience by using fragrances, music, tea/hot chocolate afterwards, so the senior looks forward to a pleasant event as opposed to a battle over undressing and being immersed in water.

In addition, there's always the issue of a frail elderly person becoming too chilled and/or slipping in the wet tub or shower.

Grammyteacher Sep 2017
Here is a link to a Teepa Snow video that might help. https://youtu.be/IxwJgDg3bYU

With my mom, it took a lot of trial and error and making adjustments as she progressed. Earlier on, I would make sure to warm up the room where she would be bathing and dressing. I purchased a nice Terry cloth robe to put on immediately upon getting out. We had a shower chair and hand held sprayer. I made sure the water temp was adjusted and had the sprayer situated where it would not get her until she was in and seated. I also had the wash cloths ready with soap on them. There was a dressing chair in a warmed room when she got out. When everything was ready, I would say, "momma, time for a shower, it is all ready" and just take her in.

When she further progressed (and yes, that is down) she was afraid of the running water, the sounds, etc. So we started giving her a "bath" on the bedside commode with the bucket off. I lined the floor with towels, washed and rinsed while sitting there. It gave access to her down under areas. I have Peri bottles for spraying those areas.

First her hair was done at the salon. When that became tough, we did it in the kitchen sink with sprayer and an amazing thing called a hair funnel I ordered on Amazon.

Now, in stage 7 she gets bed baths 2-3 times a week. We use no rinse soap.

Caregiving with demensia, takes a lot of patience and flexibility. And our motto is, this too shall pass (or at least change) 😁

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