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Hagmann Asked February 2017

Mom has left rehab. What should I do?

So here's the issue. Mom had a back surgery and was admitted in the nursing home for rehabilitation. After a week or so, two weeks, she complained and went all into a rage with the nurses. I saw the nurses doing all they can to help her, and treat her nice but she was mean to them saying they didn't do this and that. A lot of cliams my mom made I didn't see. So, I was there with her all day everyday watching to see what they would do and if you let her tell it, it did look like they really wasn't doing anything. Anyways, mom made a complaint and all of the headquarters came to her rescue. People got sent home, ect. All kinds of things. I'm not saying that there wasn't any discomfort at times but my mom was doing a lot better there than she is now. She could walk but now she can't. I'm 31 years old, I'm unemployed due to the recession I was laid off, im a minister and been married for only 7 years. I'm here 4 days out the week now LIVING! While my husband slaves two jobs and comes home to an empty house with the chores and cooking to do. I'm also being abused verbally and sexually abused verbally and she wants to keep this quiet. I tried to say no but it wears on my conscience. I'm here even if I don't stay, I'm here almost 6 days out the week. All day until it's time for hubby to go to work. It's causing issues in my marriage. She only pays me $100. I pour her doo doo out. Plus she has a toilet over the toilet and a bedside toilet. I change sheets, I do all house chores. For only $100 for 5 to 6 days out the week plus overnight stay. What do I do? I'm on the verge of hiking away from here. Leaving husband and all. This woman is a narrsacist. I've asked hubby to get me away from here. I'm adopted. Her thing is I was adopted to take care of her when she gets old. My neighbor Harass me for sex. I'm already dealing with a lot. I'm just feeling off everywhere. My nephew asked me for sex the day before my wedding and she calls him caretaker. And he comes over here all the time. What do I do? When I have dogs and mean old women around me? That God says honor? Sometimes, I wish I was never adopted or ever born.

Hagmann Feb 2017
Thanks so much guys. I've recently suffered assault two years ago I don't. I don't want to keep feeling obligated to be here in my child hood molester face and all she can say is shh don't tell his mom? It will bring division? Oh it's so much I endure here. Thanks guys. Really appreciate this. She has others who can look after her. 6 more kids. One stay next door. She's even trying to run. One lives down the road I live on the other side of town. She has over 20 grandkids. I think one mom removed her kid due to this. He was watching her. He's only like, 8. She was bragging so much to make others feel bad because how he did this and that for her, Haven't heard anything else from the child or the mother of mom in over a month. Thanks. You're right about that sanity part. My husband said the same thing. I've came close to loosing it two years ago. Now this? 

Thank you so much. I'll tell him (my husband) to come get me (pick me up) in the morning. Thanks again.

Pray for me that I won't let guilt killed me. You know what I mean? It's like you leave and at first it's liberating and then guilt sets in, what if sets in, compassion ect. It's so annoying! And you never know how much you can take until you leave. So I'm leaving but I pray that I can set healthy boundaries. I'm studying a lot of psycology and how people manipulate you with emotions and self pity but still that conscience.  It can be a good thing or a bad thing sometimes. 

jeannegibbs Feb 2017
You walk away, from however much of this you need to. Your so-called mother first of all, and your husband if that seems appropriate. Plan ahead. Know where you will go, and who might help you. Notify APS that a vulnerable adult is being left alone. Then close the door gently on your way out.

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pamstegma Feb 2017
You walk away. Save your own sanity by getting out of there.

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