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Terimarie Asked October 2016

Angry that hospice left my moms body for over 24 hrs and no one followed up.

My mom died 2 weeks ago and we took care of her (moved into her apt) at an assisted living facility for the last 11 days of her life. When she did pass, my husband and I both projectile vomitted while waiting for the funeral home. We were told by hospice and the facility to not worry about anything, they would take care of everything and we should rest. The next day I called to make sure she had been picked up before my brother went to clean out her room and she was still there. One message from Hospice on my phone saying they couldn't reach the funeral home. It took me all of a minute to find another number on their site, call and arrange pick up. I'm so pissed and not sure the best way to unload but starting here. Not sure if talking with our hospice team or just writing a general complaint letter is the best way to go. Feel like I need to get my anger of my heart to close the chapter but worried I'm just deflecting. Feels outrageous they didn't make more of an effort, hospice or the facility to contact us when they had 3 family members they could have called who had been there day in day out taking care of her. Thanks for listening.

jeannegibbs Oct 2016
Wow! I'd be angry, too. That is certainly a serious violation of the trust you put in both organizations. You did the right thing to speak to a hospice manager. I think I'd contact the facility as well. And then I'd shake it off and focus on other things.

zythrr Oct 2016
Sorry for the loss of your mom,Terimarie.

Speaking from experience, Cleveland Clinic satellite hospitals (don't know about the main ones) would call you to go to the hospital, and sign for the body to be released before the funeral home. If they could not reach you after phone calls, they'd call the police to visit your home and give you a message that the body has to be moved.

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Terimarie Oct 2016
Thank you again Bablou. I contacted Hospice to talk with a manager about what happened to make sure she was aware, where I felt the procedures could be improved and to state that it was an unfortunate situation that had made the grieving process more difficult for our family ultimately hoping it wouldn't happen to others. Feel better already. All the best to you.

BarbBrooklyn Oct 2016
Teri, ultimately, yes, you have to " let it go". You can't let it destroy you, or preoccupy you. Write letters to the administration of both organizations. Perhaps send a complaint to your local " tv consumer guy". Take some action, but......

Don't let it get in the way of your grief. Sometimes, some folks use some "wrong" that has happened so as to focus their anger. It gets in the way of grieving. And ultimately, holding onto anger doesn't help us.

Be at peace, and know that your mom is there too!

Terimarie Oct 2016
Thank you for your response Babalou. I really appreciate it. Everyone tells us to let it go, that it was just human error but it is outrageous that they (Hospice or the facility) didn't follow up. My mom would have been so angry
and don't want this to happen to anyone else. Sigh.

BarbBrooklyn Oct 2016
Teri, I'm outraged on your behalf!! I think the facility and Hospice must both have lousy communication protocols. I'd complain to both corporate offices.

I'm so sorry for your loss, and this unbearbly unfortunate wrinkle. You did your best for your mom while she was alive, when it counted most, but she didn't deserve being ignored afterwards.

Probably also a Health Department violation.

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