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2parents Asked September 2016

I have both my aging parents at my home. I am still working. My Dad is slipping into dementia and my Mom is house bound.

When Dad gets confused he get angry and takes his spite out on Mom when she tries to correct him. Should she correct him or just let him think he is right? Since I am not home to help during the day, how can I help Mom?

Windyridge Sep 2016
Absolutely......My Mom has had to learn how to Bob and weave with my Dads dementia. She's doing pretty well these days, no correcting, arguing or scolding. She tells him what he needs to hear, diverts his attention and fibs a little to keep him on track.

2parents Sep 2016
Thanks. Mom gets offended when he snaps back at her. I will advise her to see if she can just let it be.

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freqflyer Sep 2016
2parents, it is best for Mom to try to start learning to agree with whatever Dad says when he is confused. It won't be easy as I remember when my Dad first started with sundowning dementia I kept trying to correct him even though I knew I shouldn't be doing that. It took a month to get myself in the non-correcting mode.

I also found that if I redirect the subject to something that Dad enjoyed doing, such as his hobby his whole life was studying the weather nationwide.... I could ask him if we would get rain today and his mind would loop back to the here and now, and he would chat about the droughts, wild fires, tornados, and hot weather.

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