Find Senior Care (City or Zip)
Join Now Log In
K
korelys1 Asked September 2016

My mother is 76 years old and I would like to take care of her.

She does not want anyone else to take care of her. How can I get informed?

pamzimmrrt Sep 2016
I agree with FF, our companion for Dad was awesome, and when mom needs more than hubs we will try to steal her back! Everyone we meet is a stranger at first. I try to be optimistic, while being a realist.
Zytrhr, I guess if you don;t do your basic homework on places and Cgs... YOU might end up just passing your family member off to stranger...but most are on here so that doesn't happen,, they are looking for advice to avoid problems down the road. Maybe you know Nasmir? (spelling possibly wrong,, sentiment remains) You two are very similar in your optimistic outlooks

zythrr Sep 2016
fregflyer

That's nice about the help for your dad.

Elders with no children? Sure strangers will help,

ADVERTISEMENT


zythrr Sep 2016
JessieBelle- You're wrong. I was a caregiver to my wonderful sweet and loving mom until she passed in June. She felt bad that she thought because of her, I had no life (no wife or kids). She even mentioned one day she would be gone and that I would have a life. Those words bring tears,since she is gone.

I'm trying to give some advice whether some take it or not. My mom died of Sepsis which I mentioned in a post about another member whose mom is going through roughly the same thing. I would hope that you don't think some members are here to antagonize and play games.

zythrr Sep 2016
cwillie

Keeping it real, You can't trust a lot of people today.

freqflyer Sep 2016
zytrhr, my Dad has been taken care of by a "stranger" who has now been a caregiver to my Dad for almost a year, she is like part of his extended family.

This wonderful lady has been down this road many times with other clients, highly experienced, very personable, and Dad really enjoys her company. She doing a much better job than I would as she is 20 years younger then I am thus she has a lot of energy. I was never able to pick Dad up when he fell, nor be able to help him up out of his recliner, but this caregiver does it with very little effort.

And what about elders who never had any children, such as myself, it will be strangers helping me way down the line. And some parents have outlived their children. Again, dedicated strangers will be helping them.

cwillie Sep 2016
Zytrhr, your little one sentence gibes are getting on my nerves. Every service person you invite into your life from plumber to bath aide to taxi driver is a stranger but sometimes we need the help of a stranger. And every new friend was a stranger the first day we met.

JessieBelle Sep 2016
I think the OP left the building.

zythrr Sep 2016
cwillie

Pass mom off to a stranger?

Miasmom1 Sep 2016
Hi Korelys, I would invite you just to spend some time reading through the forum. That is the best way to get a good sense of what you might be walking into, regardless of your relationship with your mother. Consider your own life, are you happy with where you are now, or are there things you still want to do? don't be afraid to sit down and really consider your own. Please do this before making a decision. Best of luck to you.

freqflyer Sep 2016
korelys1, please read this article before you make a final decision https://www.agingcare.com/articles/Living-with-Elderly-Parents-Do-You-Regret-the-Decision-133798.htm and read the "comments".

There is so much to decide. Plus we really need more information to help guide us to a good answer for you. Such as do you work? What would happen financially if you had to quit work? As asked previously, what are your Mom's medical needs or are their none, you just want to live together?

cwillie Sep 2016
"She does not want anyone else to take care of her."

That's a big red flag, nobody can be there 100% of the time. If your mom won't accept outside help then what happens when you need time off for yourself?

JessieBelle Sep 2016
What's wrong that she would need care? Most people I've known are okay at 76.

ADVERTISEMENT

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter