My wife (57) with severe dementia needs 24 hour care and I work and can't afford it. Is there funding?

Insurance doesn't cover any home care, etc. all out of pocket

I'm assuming you have health care insurance through your employer, which covers both you and your wife. Have you contacted either someone in HR or someone at your health insurance company to determine if there are provisions in your health care policy for this kind of care?

Lord. I am so sorry. Today! Make an appointment with an attorney who specializes in elder law. She can explain the process for applying for Medicaid and how it will effect each of you.

Knowledge is power.