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amyrup Asked August 2013

When does it get easier?

Mom passed away on July 15, I have my good days and bad days. everyone tells me it will get easier. I am not so sure about that, especially the way I am feeling today. So very sad today, stressed over other events in my life. I have lost 6 pounds in the last 2 weeks because I am barely eating. Already went to doctor he put me on stronger anti anxiety meds........

amyrup Aug 2013
Thanks, I went to her gravesite last week and took my shoes off and just sat down and started talking to her. I know she is not physically there, but I just rambled on and on and it felt good!

Perseverance Aug 2013
Let the tears flow, honey. They bring healing in time. They really do. Also, find safe friends to confide in. Life is temporary and fragile; the death of a loved one reminds us of this and our own mortality. Loving another is beautiful - and your tears are an expression of your love.

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amyrup Aug 2013
Thank you both for your answers. I am just worn out, and today is getting to me, I seem to have at least 1 really bad day a week, where all I want to do is cry.

vstefans Aug 2013
At only two weeks. with other stuff going on, you are doing pretty well just to write so coherently. It does get better, make sure the meds are not ones that diminish your appetite and remember to eat if you do nothing else. I got through things by being busy with various paperwork things and my folks "stuff," giving away some, saving and organizing some as projects I could work on later...there was not enough time away from work for me either but, well, you just be as gentle with yourself as you can given what really has to get done during the difficult time. If there is any grief group you can join it may help some, there was one at my Mom's hospice that was good for me. There will be anniversaries and "first holidays without" that you will find hit you harder again, but overall, it really does get better, though it really does take longer than most people expect. In fact, in some ways grief changes you forever, but though it seems hard to believe while it is still so fresh, it does not hurt this much forever. Hugs and prayers...

Perseverance Aug 2013
May God encourage you during your grief. Losing a loved one is so painful. Find ways to celebrate your mother's life - perhaps take old photos and create a book of memories. Ask God for His grace and comfort. Call you friends and spend time with those you love. Rediscover activities and places that make you happy and give you joy. Fill your life with goodness.

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