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I think generally the DNR itself is the *health care system's* document, and order in the medical chart, that should reflect what is in the living will. Different hospitals have different regs about it, how it is documented and communicated. Bottom line is no one should ever have to have something done that they don't want, and should not be denied what they do want as far as lifesaving care. It should be flexible and individual, not usually just all or nothing. You can say no intubation or ventilator at all ever, you can say no intubation or ventilator if it is going to be long term (it can be stopped if started), you can say no CPR, but still give me IV meds and OK to try defibrillator x 1...you can say full code, do everything UNLESS I sustain severe brain damage and will be permanently unconsious or unable to _____, you can say yes or no to temporary or permanent tube feeding (makes sense for some situations, not for others) etc. Basically make sure you understand what you do or don't want and that your health care proxy/POA understands your wishes and have them in writing, which makes it more likely that they will respect them in case you can' t express them yourself.
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Hospice is a great source for DNRs - they will answer any questions and provide you the info needed in your state. It seems to me that physicians are not always up to date with the laws of the state as it pertains to end of life issues. I hope things go well with you and yours - it's tough!
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Recently found out that in NYS a living will is used as a guideline for family members, but not considered a legal document like a DNR. Now I have arranged for hospice care at home for my mom, so the admitting nurse had me sign the form for the DNR. I am glad to have everything in place ahead of time. Also glad to know hospice will help me when my mom eventually passes.
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Thanks for replies. I have power of atty, health proxy and living will forms already signed and living will includes advance directives including no cardiac resuscitation. I hope that is enough.
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I know in my state you can download the form from the state.gov and fill out with a DR signature...
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Living will is not the same thing as a DNR. The patient has to sign the DNR ahead of time, or have a designated health care proxy on a signed form. Hospitals will ask when you are admitted if you want resuscitation. Mom says she has a DNR, but when she got to the ER she wanted full resuscitation. She said "I just don't want to be hooked up to machines to keep going."
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You usually get this with your doctor ahead of any crisis. Then you keep a copy, and dr files a copy. If you are already at hospital, talk with attending physician and case manager and have them advise you or help you get this set up. My mom did this and then brought it home when my dad was discharged with hospice care. We posted it above his bed clearly visible to all visiting health professionals and caregivers.
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DNR should be included in the living will.
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Most hospitals will provide a durable power of attorney and a living will declaration that must be signed by two people with a witness. Living wills provide advanced directives concerning antibiotics, dialysis, blood transfusions, comfort measures, cardiac measures, feeding tubes, artificial life support and so on.

Mine is already done and I am only 41.
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