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VaHarleygirl Asked July 2013

Paying for dad's care w/o impoverishing mom?

Dad is 67, almost 68. Has VA pension + SS. Mom will be 65 later this year, they've been married 45 years. Lost their home; life insurance policy apparently allowed to lapse by dad prior to diagnosis.
The only "asset" they have is a 11 y/o car, that will need to be replaced w/in 3 years. Dad totaled his motorcycle shortly before losing their home.

Mom was SAHM, so she gets 1/2 of Dad's SS benefit. They have TriCare.

While they do live with me & pay ~ 1/2 of the rent/util & most in-house food, I have ZERO additional income to assist, am working 2 jobs to support my pre-teen son.

Mom's been told dad "makes too much" to qualify for VA A&A, or Medicaid. Yet, without his 'income', she'd be starving & on the street.

We know his individual SS amount goes with him/towards his care. What options are there in re: his VA pension, that can take care of my mother's living costs, as she has been his 100% supported dependent all of their married life, including all of his military career?

We live in Virginia. Thank you.

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