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brandiwebb Asked July 2010

We were told my dad needs hospice. I took him from his home in CA to be with me in FL. I'm active duty in the Navy and we have to leave FL soon. Should I set him up here if we have to leave in 45 days?

we were told Hospice for dad. I had to uproot himfrom his home in CA and bring him to FL . Do i set it up here if we leave in 45 days? i am active duty navy, and had been on permissive orders to be in CA to care for my dad. I was called back to my duty station in FL for staffing reasons, and to complete my end of enlistement paperwork. My dad's situation changed just before I had to leave and we were told he needed to go into Hospice care. With his limited income, I am his caregiver, and had no choice but to bring him to FL with me. I know that medicare will cover hospice, as his primary insurance is kaiser permanente in CA (not available in FL), but if we are leaving soon, and he can hang on until the permanent move back to CA, should i set it up here? the doctor's said 2-6 months if we are lucky. dad is also an alcoholic and not very nice at times nor compliant in his treatment. i want him to be comfortable but i feel like my hands are tied and i do not know what to do. also, he has a DNR in his living trust, if he dies here at my home, who do i call? any feedback is appreciated, thanks

EXPERT Carol Bradley Bursack, CDSGF Jul 2010
How often are the hospice people with your dad now? Will he be alone if you keep him there while you make this change or will some other family member be there? Hospice could guide you about who to call if he dies.

If possible, I wouldn't move him too much, but I'm not clear about the in-between move and how long that is (and where). Medicare should cover his hospice anywhere. Much depends on what he wants. Have you asked him? Also, it depends on whether someone can watch over him when hospice is not there.

Hospice also cares for people in a nursing home setting if that is an option. It seems he should have someone looking after him. I'd talk this over with your current hospice, the doctor and also your dad.

This is important: There is no perfect answer. Don't blame yourself if things aren't all going smoothly. You are doing your best under very trying circumstances. Get some third party decisions and they go with the best answer you can figure out.

Take care,
Carol

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