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babziellia Posted December 2021

Mom passed on Thanksgiving evening.

Mom passed peacefully and painlessly the evening of Thanksgiving, her favorite holiday.


I haven't posted in quite a while, since Mom went on hospice care in our home last July.


I'm so blessed to have had Mom these past 2 years and to care for her, even though y'all know it was NOT a rosey experience at all.


Thank God for hospice. Thank God for the wisdom to have preplanned the cremation arrangements. Thank God for my family and for friends who'd been through this experience and willingly guided and listened to me. And, thank God for y'all and this forum!


I'll be around because the support y'all gave me is invaluable, and I want to continue to support y'all.


Two of Mom's favorite things to say:


Keep a song in your heart and a singing bird will come.


I press on toward the prize and I run straight toward the goal (Jesus).


I'll end with this story of Mom's last days:
Sunday was a pretty good day. My brother visiting and made Mom one of her favorite seafood meals. We were able to get her outside with the private aide. Mom facetimed with one of her grandsons and tracked with the conversation better than recently. She SMILED and seemed happy.
Monday morning was different, and the week was rough. Each day, Mom awoke yelling and screaming in anxiety, fearful to be alone. My son and I took turns sitting with her until she was calm and able to rest. Each day we increased her hospice med until finally Wednesday Mom was calm. We still took turns sitting with her. She was talkative and alert. Still bossing me about what to cook for Thanksgiving and giving me a recipe. I stayed up past midnight until I was sure she was able to sleep and stay asleep. Thanksgiving morning, the hospice aide came at 06:30. I greeted Mom with good morning and happy Thanksgiving! Mom smiled and tried to talk. She was struggling, but happy. However, by 09:30, she wasn't talking - awake but semi responsive- but not anxious or fearful. Hospice nurse came. Mom was transitioning, she said. By noon, Mom was still awake, but totally unresponsive. We spent the day in and out of Mom's room, sitting with her, talking to her. By mid afternoon, eyes closed, but Mom was still with us. The day progressed into evening.


I realized that morning that Mom, as I knew her, was gone. I'd never communicate with her like before. She'd never talk or squeeze my hand again. I spent the morning crying and grieving. However expected and anticipated, this was hard. But then our private aide came that evening and shared with me something Mom told her the night before while we were all out running our last minute Thanksgiving errands or on the way home from work (other son). It was just Mom and the aide. Mom told the aide, "They're here. "
Aide says, "No, it's just me and you; they'll all be back soon though."
Mom insists, "No, they're here. Can't you see them? Right there."
Aide asks, "Wait, who's here?"
Mom just says, "They're here. They've come for me. I'm ready to go. "


So, Mom knew. Peace and calm came to me. Later that night, I whispered to Mom that I loved her and it was time to take Jesus' hand and walk. As I settled in to sleep in a chair next to Mom, I went to hold her hand again, and although it was warm, she was gone.


God is good.
Peace to you all.

graygrammie Dec 2021
In spite of the sorrow and loss, you are blessed. Thank you for sharing.

Momheal1 Dec 2021
I am so sorry for you loss and thank you so much for sharing your personal and beautiful goodbye (“for now”). I sobbed reading this - but it was a peaceful cry - one of comfort and genuine peace.

Again Thank you for sharing - You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers 🦋

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cxmoody Dec 2021
Thank you for sharing this beautiful story!

Tynagh Dec 2021
Condolences on your loss. I am glad that you and your mother had a good final day. Hugs to you.

Isthisrealyreal Dec 2021
Babzi, what a wonderful blessing that the aid was there to hear "They are here and I am ready" and that she shared this wonderful news with you.

I am so sorry for your loss. May The Lord continue to give you strength, peace and grieving mercies.

This journey and new season are so much easier when we know that our LO believes and will be there to accompany us on our forever journey to the loving arms of Jesus, Lord and Saviour. That is truly what Thanksgiving is about IMO.

God bless and keep you.

LisaSF Dec 2021
I'm so sorry for your loss. As difficult as it is, it sounds like she (and you) experienced a peaceful passing. I agree - thank God for hospice. Hugs to you in this journey.

gladimhere Dec 2021
I am so sorry for your loss. You arranged such a pleasant and peaceful passing for her.

golden23 Dec 2021
((((((hugs))))) and my deepest sympathies. Thank you for sharing. May the memories you have of your mum be of great comfort to you in the coming days.

Llamalover47 Dec 2021
I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. Deepest condolences.

polarbear Dec 2021
Babziella - what a blessing it was for your mom to be at peace and ready for her journey home. I absolutely believe they were there to accompany her. I am so glad that you are at peace with her passing, too.

SnoopyLove Dec 2021
God bless you as you mourn your beloved mother. And thanks for describing the details of her passing in such an insightful and transparent way. I know it will help me when the time comes for my loved one and I’m sure it will assist others as well.

BarbBrooklyn Dec 2021
So beautifully written.

I'm so sorry for your loss. (((((Hugs)))))))).

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