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three3meow3 Posted November 2019

Laughing and crying at the same time.

Sis died over a year ago. Six months later wife of nephew called me and told me I could no longer have access to their 3 children which left me with no one, No family where I live and all friends have died or moved. I've been working gradually to get some kind of contact with nephew's kids. Today I found out what a big part of the problem is. I am the sole survivor of sister. Nephew seemed to think that once his mother had passed on he could get rid or me as a member of his family! I informed him that blood relationships are forever and that he is still my nephew and his children will always be my great (grand) nephew and nieces. He cannot throw me out of the family just because his mother died. She is still his mother (deceased). It struck me as funny that he should, at 67, think that way (get rid of mom and sister at the same time.) But it is sad, too, to think that this college-educated man can't figure that out or find it on the internet. He thinks he is so intelligent he doesn't need information on the internet. But maybe I got my point across and he will now give me access to his children, I hope.
Sorry but just had to share this with someone. As I said funny but also sad.
Thanks for reading.

TNtechie Dec 2019
"no family where I live" Does this mean there is family somewhere else? Have your considered moving and reconnecting with other family and finding some new friends? Maybe look into places with good senior centers and services like senior transportation and adult day care. Maybe a senior apartment?

cwillie Dec 2019
Sometimes blood is not thicker than water, there must be a reason your nephew has decided to go no contact - perhaps that is what you need to focus on.

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NeedHelpWithMom Dec 2019
Im sorry that you were hurt. Rejection can be hard but do you really want a relationship with someone that doesn’t want a relationship with you?

Can you make connections with others that would appreciate you? Blood doesn’t always make a family. Good friends can become your new family members.

My friend did this because her sisters were so mean to her. She decided that she would choose other people to be her family. She stays out of their way and they don’t want her as their sister. They don’t have a relationship at all. She was very upset at first but later on accepted it because she didn’t have a choice. She wasn’t going to force herself on them.

My friend doesn’t have any other family either. Her parents have been dead for years.

If your nieces and nephews wish to contact you outside of their parents they will.

Geaton777 Dec 2019
Im sorry for your situation, but this is a forum for caregivers. Were you caregiving someone? Do you have a caregiving-related question? Also, if your nephew is 67 his kids must be in their 30s-ish? Is this who you are trying to contact? Why not try to find them on Facebook? Good luck

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