What are today's constant phone calls about?

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Today as most days my mother in law has called numerous times. Each day she has some obsession. Two days ago it was that his dad's girlfriend was hiding under his bed, last week their was a 16 year old hooker servicing all the men at the nursing home. Today she's called 4 times already accusing my husband of stealing her car keys to go joy riding. Each call has gotten more and more angry. We often wonder what pushes her button to go on these tangents. My husband now just lets them go to voicemail. If you try to reassure you she often forgets by the end of the conversation anyway.


Sorrynotsorry, sorry I had to chuckle at some of the remarks that your mother-in-law was saying. I know it is hard when it is someone in your own family saying these things.

Did hubby enjoy his joy riding in his Mom's car? Keep a log of these items to look back upon. I wished I had written down things my late Mom-in-law said, she was a pistol.

I wonder if elders see something on TV and think it is happening right there in their assisted living or nursing home. Or they hear another person gossiping, again thinking what they heard, or thought they heard, was real.
I also let a lot of the calls go to voice mail. Usually it's about pooping, diet coke, someone stealing something (she's misplaced or hidden) or wanting to go to the library. Occasionally she leaves a message requesting I call back....and I wonder, is there any way she's going to remember why she called, or that she even did?

And yes, lots of phone calls end up being the same question and answer repeated about 5 times. No way my Mom is remembering anything. ha!
sorrynotsorry, I am so glad to hear that I am not the only one going through this. My mom calls me every other minute with the same thing - "the cat needs Fancy Feast (I have to monitor the cat food), I need Fruit of the Loom underwear (she has 30 pairs) and I'm sorry I'm late, but I'll make it up to you". Not nearly as bad as the calls you get! I was letting the calls go to voice mail but the voice mail got full in a matter of hours, so I hate to say that I just take the phone off of the hook. I had to stop the call waiting because she would interrupt the important calls. Now, when I take the phone off the hook, I am missing those calls! I have to call everyone and give them my cell number. Most days she starts calling at 6 a.m. while other of her calls start at 1a.m.
I quit watching the weather on TV since Mom is my new weather updater
My father used to call me at work every time he messed up his remote expecting me to just leave work and fix it. Showing him how to fix it himself was not the answer he wanted. Now he just calls to talk about his poop.
Lkdrymom, my mom messes up the remote all the time! If I can't get there, she calls a neighbor (sometimes).
Yesterday Mom called several times, the majority I let go to voice mail. The first call around noonish was a response to her glass having a chip in it at lunch and culminated in her yelling with uncontrollable rage at me via voice mail. (happens all the time on the phone, not nearly as often in person, but it does happen in person too. NOT FUN)
She proceeded to call several more times, and she left voice mails about library books mostly, and every voice mail she was sassy and cranky. I did answer once, and we discussed her library books being due in July. When I tried to explain it was an old note and we were now in August, she finally got to the point, which was that she wanted to get new books. Why she felt the need to strategize a phone call about the library with due dates to back her up, I'm not sure, but that's what it felt like when I finally made the connection.
She called this morning at 7am, let it go to voice mail, but her voice mail asked, in a snarky- put-out tone for me to come rescue her.
All I can think of is that she must have gotten results in the past (you know, gotten her way) by being ugly, snarky, and difficult until she wore the person down. It's like my Mom is now a toddler!!!! Breakfast is almost over, so I anticipate a call soon. UGH
The best way to deal with that is to no answer the calls immediately. My father would call and insist I had to come over after work to deal with some made up crisis. I would decline and say I couldn't get there for at least 2 days. Funny the crisis was forgotten about by the time I arrived. Of course he couldn't just tell me that and save me a trip. I certainly would not put up with answering a snarky demand. That voicemail would get deleted. Yes they are like small children that want your attention NOW!!!
If Mom is in a home, take the phone away. Tell her she must have lost it. By the time my Mom entered an AL she didn't know how to use a phone. I had the microwave taken out of her room. Was afraid she would put something into it she shouldn't. The calling at work would stop. My own family was not allowed to call me unless an emergency. Of course, my husband worked a 5 to 1 to my 8 to 5 so an adult was there.

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