Find Senior Care (City or Zip)
Join Now Log In
L
Lov2teach Asked June 2022

Is it normal for my 88-year-old mother with dementia to lose interest in watching TV?

She’s in a memory unit in an AL facility. She’s mostly bed ridden as she has no desire to get out of bed. Recently, she doesn’t want the TV on and just lays in bed watching the Echo Show monitor (I use it to FaceTime with her) as the pictures change on it. Watching TV was the only thing she did until now for entertainment. She doesn’t want to participate in social activities in MC. I’m wondering if this is part of her decline, although I haven’t noticed that anything else has changed. Guess I worry about her quality of life since she just lays in bed all day and does nothing. I live out of state and visit once a month for a few days and call on the Echo Show daily. My brother lives about 30 minutes from the AL and visits once a week. Has anyone noticed a loss of interest in watching TV when a LO has dementia? Thanks!

JoAnn29 Jun 2022
My Mom was never a big TV watcher. Never had it on during the day and only watched a few shows at night. She was an avid reader though. She lost that ability with Dementia.

TV is boring. I do not like any if the virtual reality shows or 60 min type things. What I do is stream some of the old shows. There is also a channel called MeTV. Has shows from the 60s/70s. I would put this in for Mom and seemed to hold her interest.
Cover999 Jun 2022
Matlock, In the Heat of The Night, Lone Ranger, Hopalong Cassidy, Wyatt Earp to name a few
NancyIS Jun 2022
I also saw this with my mother, who had advanced dementia. First she lost interest in reading, watching films, then TV. People with dementia lose their short term memory. Imagine if you started watching a film and couldn't remember the beginning by the time you got to the end. My mother enjoyed listening to music. I got her a radio, but staff had to turn it on and off for her. We kept it on the channel that plays music that she likes. For a time, she enjoyed small stuffed toys. She liked certain blankets, with colorful patterns. All the best to you and your mother.

ADVERTISEMENT


stephm1 Jun 2022
Yes
Cover999 Jun 2022
:}
Grandma1954 Jun 2022
Many cable providers have "Music" channels.
Find a genre of music she likes and play that for her.
Or often a particular artist can be played continuously.
My Husband had problems with lots of shows. For example:
The setting was dark on a lot of shows.
Music in the background over powered the spoken word.
Background noise often did the same.
Story lines were fast and he lost the ability to keep track of what was going on.

lkdrymom Jun 2022
My father loved TV but didn't watch it for the last 3 years of his life.

CaregiverL Jun 2022
My mother watches TV 📺 all day with her eyes closed

freqflyer Jun 2022
Lov2teach, regarding TV shows, I know for myself, the newer shows the younger actors tend to talk too fast plus mumble, it's like trying to following what Ozzie Osborn is trying to say. I found using the "closed caption" helpful but one has to speed read to keep up.

Our cable company recently updated their TV Guide, and there are now many more steps involved when trying to find something good to watch. New and improved... NOT.

MJ1929 Jun 2022
My mother couldn't follow the storylines on TV shows after her dementia progressed. That's likely what's going on, plus she might not know how to operate the remote.

KathleenQ Jun 2022
I agree that it may be too much for her to follow. There are special videos for people with dementia that we had for my father- babies doing things, quickly changing and funny, animals -cute and doing funny things, basic fish tank video-hard to resist. Also, music from her era may reach a different part of her brain.

lealonnie1 Jun 2022
As my mother's dementia advanced, first she stopped reading books, then magazines, and then finally, she stopped watching television. She just couldn't comprehend what was being said or what was going on with a TV program anymore. But what she COULD comprehend was love & kindness from me and from her caregivers, and other people who tended to her needs. That she was very appreciative of. We switched on a music channel for her on her TV set and she did get enjoyment from listening to music.

In spite of what TChamp keeps droning on and ON about here on the forum, elders with dementia DO have some quality of life left when loved ones visit them, when they get special treats to eat, when they get to see photos (or visits from) of their grand and great grandchildren, and when they get gifts or tokens of love & affection from those that love and appreciate them. LOVE prevails and overrides disease! Even people who are in a COMA are able to HEAR and know when loved ones are nearby holding their hands & speaking with them. While we ALL KNOW that dementia is a terrible and 'incurable' disease, we ALSO know that our loved ones are still THERE inside their bodies, and that WE are there FOR THEM, too! We're not writing them off or tossing them aside like garbage b/c they are suffering from dementia! They are still worthy of all the same love and attention we'd show anyone else we respect and love in our lives! They're family members, for petesake! I visited my mother with advanced dementia at least weekly and more during the last months of her life, and I know that she appreciated those visits, and so did I, as hard as they were. I'm glad I visited her and I'm glad I did all that I did for her, and would do it all again in a heartbeat.

When we come to forum with questions & concerns, we are looking for empathy and suggestions for help......a way to get through to our loved ones who are difficult or who suffer from dementia and seem 'impossible' to deal with. We are not here to hear that our loved ones are 'hopeless' or that they're 'incurable' or that there's 'nothing we can do for them at all.' That's B.S., pure and simple. If we wanted to write them off, we'd have done that long ago and wouldn't be on a forum seeking advice!
TChamp Jun 2022
Once dementia reaches a certain point, the disconnection with the outside world is lost completely. This includes the ability to respond emotionally to outside stimulus. That's why many caregivers feel frustrated when their best efforts to please the demented person produces anger and even violence in the recipient instead of gratitude. In dementia, the emotional responses are as confused as their thoughts. Caregivers need to know their limitations in trying to bring happiness to a person with advance dementia. Otherwise, they feel that they aren't doing enough and it creates unnecessary guilt and a feeling of helplessness. Being objective and realistic doesn't hurt.
poodledoodle Jun 2022
Hi! The mother (slight dementia) of a friend of mine, stopped watching TV too (but not completely). She’ll watch the news. (She was a politician).

However she completely stopped watching movies: too difficult for her to follow the plot. She used to read a lot of novels: too difficult to remember the plot, characters.

But politics is fine. In fact, with dementia: often what stays intact as long as possible, is long-term memory and your life-long expertise (in her case, politics).

Anabanana Jun 2022
Same here. My mother is 97, late mid-stage to advanced dementia. (bad days, worse days) Until 1 year ago she watched shows like Murdoch Mysteries and Murder, She Wrote, and the news. DVDs of old favourites, like The Carol Burnett Show. The radio was always on. She gave up shows and discovered The Weather Network, often with the sound off. I also tried housing shows, particularly ones set in other countries, again, sound off. She has since confined herself to bed and declined my repeated offers to place a tv and radio in her room.

She can hear the tv in the home’s common room and I suspect a news report scared her. She was certain police had located a girl’s body in the home. The night before, the lead news story described the awful discovery of a girl’s body in our closest big city. TV might be scary and confusing.

Like you, I hate to see these declines. I take my iPad and try to show her photos of familiar people and places. I read her mail. I subscribed to her childhood town newspaper, take it and read articles with familiar family names, businesses, etc. Most days she barely acknowledges me or tells me to leave because she wants to nap. Physically she’s in pretty good shape so I wonder how long this will go on.
TChamp Jun 2022
You have described correctly how people with dementia deteriorates. There is a point where the brain disconnect itself from the outside world completely. Some people in this forum are still in denial and want other caregivers to believe in a world of fantasy, like them.
Midkid58 Jun 2022
My mom has a 3 bedroom apartment and a TV in each room. All on the same channel, I guess in case she misses an important clue in "Murder, She Wrote".

She swears she doesn't watch it at all, but if you up up to visit during "Bonanza' you may as well not stay.

If your mom seems content with watching picture slide by, I wouldn't make any fuss whatsoever about the TV thing.

So much of what is on is plain old garbage (I am not a TV watcher, myself) and she has seen every episode of her favorite shows dozens of times.

Mom's world is very, very small. And she likes it that way. I would leave well enough alone. If she wants music--you can find a TV channel (or hundreds of them!) that simply play soothing music. I listen to my Echo all day when DH is out of the house.

LisaNJ Jun 2022
My mom watched Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune for decades and she stopped watching the last two years probably because she couldn’t follow the games. She did watch baseball and tennis still as they were slow moving.

babsjvd Jun 2022
My mom did. She was in memory care also… she wanted to sit and Rock and stare out the window..problem with that was she had regular hallucinations about animals , things going on across the street…

Finally , I was able to get her to turn on JTV jewelry show, to watch.. the caregivers got better suggesting ..about turning it on

i think it’s all part of the decline..not participating etc..physically weak I am sure..

my mom was sleeping more and more as she was dying…

TChamp Jun 2022
What do you expect from somebody who can no longer understand what is going on around her? You worry about her quality of life? She doesn't have any.
Her dementia is bringing her down. Nothing will stop her deterioration. It's unfortunate, but this is the reality of dementia. A devastating and cruel disease for which there is no cure.
newbiewife Jun 2022
I'm sure OP knows nothing will stop deterioration, and that dementia is uncurable. They are not asking about a cure but even with severe dementia there can be some subjective quality of life. As is common in your responses to questions, you are making statements about quality of life for people with dementia on the grounds that you are being brutally honest or want people to face reality. The mom does not sound to be agitated, angry, fearful, or suffering--just withdrawn--and there might still be some small things that give her pleasure. She's still a human being, with emotions. Others have suggested various options for the TV, and I know there is well-researched literature on using meaningful and familiar music for people with dementia. There are circuits in the brain that are activated by meaningful music, and it's truly astounding to see the responses of people even with very severe dementia. There is TV and videos with just beautiful images or scenery that don't require being able to follow a plot or action; there are very nice cute animal videos.
funkygrandma59 Jun 2022
I can only guess that she no longer understands what's being said and can't follow along anymore, so why watch it? Either that or she can't hear or see it well enough. Do you know if the volume is where she needs it to be, and is the TV itself large enough for her to see?
My husband who had vascular dementia and was completely bedridden for the last 22 months of his life, had the TV on 24/7. I'm not sure he always understood the spoken words, or understood what was going on, but I think he just liked having the "noise" of it on.

Geaton777 Jun 2022
It's possible that she no longer can follow what's happening on whatever show she's watching because she can't remember what she just saw, so it doesn't hold her interest or it confuses her. Maybe her hearing has decreased, or she had a TIA and now has a problem processing language, or perhaps her vision has gotten worse and she can't really see what she's looking at. It could be a lot of things.

My very elderly aunt with advanced dementia went through a phase like this, couldn't even watch kid's cartoons...language and plots too tough for her to process or retain. It would actually agitate her. But then one time we put in a Disney animated movie and accidentally had the closed captions on and now she is once again happy to watch but she is actually reading the captions aloud to herself, even reads the closing credits. I don't think she's getting the plot at all but the reading is a purposeful activity for her. My aunt is 100 yrs old and watches 2 to 3 DVDs every day, reading all the while, and the same rotation of movies (since she has no short-term memory).

Is her tv big enough to see it well from her bed? What did she used to watch? Make sure it isn't something "dark" or violent...an animal show or Disney channel or Nickelodeon might be better choices. Have your brother turn on the closed captions on your mother's tv and see if that makes a difference.

ADVERTISEMENT

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter