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Artist69 Asked January 2021

Will hospice take over when my mother dies? How much can they actually do?

Hello Caregivers, is anyone out there using hospice for their LO? I am sole caregiver for my mother age 95, who has a terminal illness. I'm scared to death I'll wake up one morning and find her dead. I have a very small family who doesn't want to be involved. So it's all on me. Where does hospice remove the body to, a morgue? How much do they intercede after the LO passes? Thank you and God bless.

AlvaDeer Jan 2021
Other than to supply some minimal grieving support they do not do anything after death. Many will also give you the phone number and contract with well priced funeral homes, and etc. I found that very helpful. But basically they and their equipment are gone shortly after the death of your loved one. Ask for their recommendations, any lists they may have for you on how to proceed after death while your LO is still alice. 95 with a terminal illness you should ask your Mom's doctor to hook you up NOW with hospice.

NeedHelpWithMom Jan 2021
When my brother died in hospice care, I chose the funeral home for his body to be delivered at.

My brother chose cremation so I followed his wishes. His ashes were placed in our family plot.

Hospice provides a social worker and clergy throughout the entire process, before a death and bereavement counseling afterwards if requested.

I wish you peace during this time of transition.

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funkygrandma59 Jan 2021
I had hospice for my husband for the last 22 months of his life. They should have by now asked you what funeral home or crematory you want to be called when your mom dies, as they will call that place to come get your mom's body after she dies. My husband died while I was sleeping, and when I woke up to give him his medications, (around 1:40 a.m.) I discovered him dead. He was still warm, so I knew that he had only died a short time prior to me finding him. I immediately called the hospice office, and they had someone here( 2 nurses actually) in about 15 minutes. The hospice nurse called the crematory place right after she pronounced him dead. After that she cleaned up my husbands body, and proceeded to get rid of any of his remaining medications. The hospice nurses were both gone before the crematory place arrived, but they arrived about 20 minutes or so later, to get my husband's body. They may have arrived sooner had it been during the day, but since it was the early morning hours, I was surprised that they came as soon as they did. Now in my case, I also had called my son, who lives local, and he came to be with me when they took my husband's(his stepfather)body out. That was nice, as he then also got to say his final goodbyes as well, and be there for me.
I wish you peace and comfort in the days ahead, and just know that your mom will be going to a better place, where there is no more suffering or pain. God bless you.

Isthisrealyreal Jan 2021
You have to decide what you want done when she passes. Will she be cremated or interned? They will deal with everything, except choosing the place, this you must do.

I recommend asking them for referrals if you don't know and calling around for pricing, it can very as much as a thousand dollars for a simple cremation.

Please ask your hospice team for everything that you have available to you during this time, you don't have to do this alone and hospice has many great resources for you as well as your mom.

I am sorry that you are facing this without family support. Great big warm hug!

Daughterof1930 Jan 2021
My dad died at home while on hospice care this past summer. When we knew he was gone we called the hospice number and his nurse came over very quickly. She certified the death and arranged for the funeral home to come and get him. She also destroyed all his meds. She was kind and supportive. When the transport was close to arriving, my family and I took a long walk around the neighborhood and witnessed none of the removal process. I highly recommend this. My dad’s hospice nurse remained throughout the whole process. The body went to the funeral home. Hospice offered us grief support counseling and also arranged for medical supplies such as the hospital bed to be picked up the next morning. My dad went peacefully, we watched as his breathing slowed over about 2 hours and then just was no more. I wish you and your mother peace
NobodyGetsIt Jan 2021
"Daughterof1930,"

I'm glad you mentioned that you and your family took a long walk around the neighborhood so as not to witness the removal process.

My husband ushered me out into the backyard as he didn't want me to even to see the van arrive. Honestly, I wanted to at that moment. I remember peeking over the fence to see it back into the driveway but, then walked away to the other side of the yard. It was late at night so I couldn't see a whole lot but, honestly since it had been our home since 1968, I wanted to see them take him down our street one last time.
NobodyGetsIt Jan 2021
Dear "Artist69,"

When I had hospice for my dad in 2004, they were there when my dad passed away and made all the necessary calls. So the van came to pick up his body and took it to the mortuary where I told them the service would be. You can always call hospice and ask them specifically what they will be doing once your mother passes away. They will also be there for you after her death to help in any way they can.

I hope that provides you with some level of comfort knowing you won't be totally alone in all of this.

I too, am now a sole caregiver for my mom who is almost 96 so I know how scary it can be.

May God be with you as you await what lies ahead.

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