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FatherSon252 Asked January 2021

Father’s health is deteriorating and I’m unsure about what to do with a Medical POA I hold from 2007. Advice?

Just like every family has issues to deal with, I’m not sure what to do at this point. Papers were drawn up in ’07 for Medical Power of Attorney, which was assigned to me. Since then, he has made claims of not being my father. I am unsure if he remembers assigning me as MPOA, and am unsure whether or not to include it with his medical records.
Over the summer, he started drinking alcohol more excessively, he was hospitalized in July and then in a physical rehabilitation center until early November.
I have two half siblings, one living hours away, and the youngest is 22 yo (who has been helping make sure his bills are paid from my father’s banking account.) Neither of my half siblings will respond to me, leaving me without sufficient information on his health.
So, being my father is an alcoholic (35+ years), suffers from some sort of dementia. Mental illnesses is highly prevalent in my family. I’ve been told a doctor would not find him incompetent.
Should I get the Medical POA put in his records, so I can know what is truly happening with his health? My fear is that he will try to revoke the MPOA, due to the claims he’s made about paternity.
Thanks to everyone who has the time to read.
-Clinton

AlvaDeer Jan 2021
I would not have this put into his record unless he assures you he wants it put in. It sounds as though there has been an you have become estranged since this POA was done. In the last years, while you have been estranged, he may have already appointed other POAs. Sounds as though the MDs are already speaking with your siblings.
Would you really want to act on his medical behalf now? If so, not knowing if he has other POA appointed, you could ask your father if he wishes this filed, or ask the hospital if they would like a copy of this POA, or if they have a newer one on record.
Medical POAs and directives can be changed any time a patient wishes to do so. I suspect your POA is no longer valid. Leave your name and number. This will leave it in their hands to reach out to you if they wish to or need to. Given the alcoholism and the dementia, and two other involved siblings, I doubt you will get anywhere, but it is worth trying. Good luck.

sjplegacy Jan 2021
If your father has been an alcoholic for over 30 yrs, his type of dementia is called Korsakoff syndrome. Alcohol abuse is the main reason for this type of dementia.

Absolutely, you should have a copy of the MPOA in his PCP's medical file and the file if any other physician he has seen. In addition, you should always have a copy in your possession for those times he's in the hospital or rehab. Because he has been diagnosed with this dementia symptom, he will not be able to revoke or change his MPOA to you. You have the authority to make his medical decisions for him until death.

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Midkid58 Jan 2021
Yes--you should be listed as MPOA. Even though it's been 14 years, it's still valid. Your dad's mental state at the time is one reason why assigning a POA when you are still in your right mind is important.

Sounds like you're kind of on your own. I'd honor the half-sibs with a bi-weekly email update on dad's condition and not expect a word in return.

If the NOT-POA sibs have medical info and no 'right' to it, you need to address that.

BTW, you don't have to be blood related to be someone's POA.

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