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OkieGranny Asked September 2018

My daughter's MIL has been diagnosed with Parkinson's. She is making bad decisions like giving $ to a distant relative. Is this typical?

She also is stalling about moving closer to one of her sons, and won't let go of possessions even though she is in an apartment and stuff is stacked everywhere. One of her sons helped her move, and left a bunch of boxes behind to get rid of, but she is gradually bringing them all to her apt.


Should they call some senior service agency to warn the person who she gave money to? They are afraid this person and others will drain the bank account.

OkieGranny Sep 2018
Thanks for the replies. I neglected to mention that she lives in a different state from either of her sons, and they both have been trying to persuade her to move nearer one of them. Gladimhere, I do stay out of it, but I wanted to pass on any helpful suggestions that were posted. This forum is a wonderful resource.

MargaretMcKen Sep 2018
Your daughter and son in law should probably talk within their family about the need to manage the lady's finances. There are many ways, of which the simplest and quickest seems to be to 'lose' her check book. Her family could make sure she understands that the government will take that money back from her if she needs future help, and that could be a disaster for her (and it's true within 5 years).

If the 'gift' was genuine, she was competent to make it and there was no fraud or coersion, there is unlikely to be any way for her to get it back. The issue is to stop it happening again. Please search the site for all the other options, or suggest that to your daughter. Yes it does matter to your daughter and her own family, because the lady may find herself in a very difficult financial situation and look to them for essential help.

As the family didn't step in to finish off the previous move and actually get rid of the boxes that were cleared up, it sounds possible that things have changed and they should now be looking at taking more involvement in what is going on. It can be a difficult step to take, and it helps a lot if all the family can make a joint decision and have a joint plan.

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gladimhere Sep 2018
If it were me, I would stay out of it. Let them work it out, their own way.

JoAnn29 Sep 2018
Dementia and Parkinsons go hand in hand. Hopefully, she gave POA to someone. Maybe time to have her evaluated. Giving money away is not a good thing. It will effect her getting Medicaid in the future. Parkinsons will eventually debilitated her physically and mentally and she will nesd more care than family to give.

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