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Dssmiles Asked March 2016

What does incapacitated mean?

I want the doctors to sign letters saying my LO is incapacitated because she has beginning stages of dementia and mental illness, and she uses a can andcwalker, she doesn't drive, and she keeps shopping online, or gets a friend to visit once a month for 3 to 4 days and nights, will take her shopping, and now she is trying to buy a dog from the friend, and she really can't take care of it, and I will be stuck with the care. I was told that I needed to freeze the accounts, or make it to where she can't sign checks without me, but for my DPOA to be legal, she needs to be incapacitated. I don't know if this is true or not?

Dssmiles Mar 2016
Thank you all for responding. I feel silly, because i wrote this in haste, and in not knowing there were D.P.O.A.s that included the clause, and took the word of another. I went back and reread, and i don't have the clause. I am going to continue to act in L.O.'s best interest, and step in when i need to, as to keep her safe and secure. LOL, i realize over shopping isn't incapacitated. I was really meaning not handling her overall finances properly, with too many irrational decisions with debt to ratio of fixed income.

We could have a good relationship, but LO has a bad attitude towards her situation, and won't or can't communicate with me at all or properly, takes me trying help and/or keeping her best interest as i am the enemy and is being incidious, and the stress dealing with her roller-coaster mood swings and antics are wearing me down, like i am sure it does most everyone. Thank you, again, for your feedback.

anonymous158299 Mar 2016
you and the patient are probably going to see a judge multiple times before any elders right to self determination is taken away .
as ( imo ) it should be ..

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GardenArtist Mar 2016
Read the DPOA; does it include that provision requiring certification of incapacity?

From what you wrote in your profile, it doesn't seem as though your relationship with your mother is a positive one. Are you sure you want to be taking care of her?

pamstegma Mar 2016
It's not quite that easy. She would have to be declared incapacitated or incompetent by two MD's that are psychiatrists or neurologists who have done some testing to prove their opinions. Overshopping is not proof of incapacity.

cwillie Mar 2016
It depends on how your POA is written, some include a clause that they only come into force after the grantor is incapacitated, some are in force as soon as the ink is dry.
Incapacitated generally has nothing to do with physical disabilities and is a judgment very hard to get when mental capacity declines, I doubt you would be able to get a doctor to declare you mother mentally incompetent due to past mental illness and early dementia.

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