How do I get my elder brother-in-law out of my home. Any advice?

Why isn't your sister stepping up? In any event, get him on Medicaid and into a facility where he can be cared for properly.

Definitely ask for a needs assessment, you can also contact adult protective services, they may be able to help to locate placement for him. It's not easy being a caregiver, especially when the caregiver has medical issues themselves. You can also contact your local area agency on aging and ask about programs that can assist him at home, a case manager may be able to find placement for him. It never hurts to ask. Good luck.

I would check that out before I let her move in. A contract will probably need to be made up stipulating that she leaves if terminated or if the person she is caring for passes away. Make sure she has someplace to return to if either happens. Otherwise u may get a squater or claims homeless.

Does this same level of provision also apply to a care giver who wants to move into MIL's house (pay rent or not certain yet) and to have her leave would a problem ensue? I do not like the idea of her moving in but the family is entertaining it to save money!

I guess he has no family? Do u have POAs? If not, isn't it going to be hard to fill out paperwork? Question, can u put him in state hands and they take over? Paperwork is stressful to me. I hate it. My favorite thing, if he goes to the hospital, tell them he can't come back to ur house. See if there is a free Lawyer service in your county. If so, they may be able to point u in the right direction.

Yes do all that Jeanne writes. Do not back down. In the meantime it will.take some time to meet his (and your) needs, you might contact your local churches because they usually have volunteers who can come and at least bring food, or just be there in your home for an hour or so, maybe do some good to have a "normal person" to talk with, they also have youth groups who could do yard work for you (they need Confirmation Projects). Hope things improve soon, but it will likely take awhile.
One more thougbt--is he a Veteran, if so call the VA as they might have some help. You could even call your State Rep and U.S. Rep and see if they can speed things along.

I suggest you call your county's Social Services department and ask for a Needs Assessment for him. When the assessment worker comes out, make it absolutely clear that he cannot continue to live in your house and that you cannot continue to care for him. Don't back down on that! Be present during the interview. BIL may paint a rosy picture that doesn't match your reality. "Of course I can make my own lunch." etc. Be sure the worker has a true picture. The worker will know about all kinds of programs, not only what the county has. He or she may recommend applying for Medicaid. Agree to help with the application process but insist you cannot take charge of it for him and he will needs someone else to help.

I understand that in some locations the requests for a needs assessment have a huge backlog. If explaining that this is an emergency and your BIL has to move does not get you a reasonable appointment date, then I'd call Adult Protection Services and explain the situation to them.

You may have to actually go through a formal eviction process, even if BIL isn't paying rent. But I'm sure you don't simply want him out on the street -- you want him cared for somewhere else, right?

You have done what you could. Feel good about that. Now that you have your own health problems it is time to turn this over to professionals.

My sincere best wishes to you! Keep us informed on how this goes for you.