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W23456 Asked July 2011

My mother left an insurance policy with me as beneficiary. Legally, am I obligated to share this with others?

AimeeD2017 Oct 2017
Can I sign my mom name to the policy with consent since she stays in another state and i maintain the policy. I pay all the premium and have since 2004. I signed her name to have the money deducted from my bank account as well. Can my sibling contest the policy if mom changed it to only me with proof why she had me sign her name?

Labs4me May 2016
A beneficiary on a term life insurance policy and is not legally obligated to share in the proceeds nor is it taxable. If the life insurance received interest, then the interest portion could be taxable.

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Bobbysans May 2016
no other comments

Bobbysans May 2016
I was named executor and beneficiary in the life insurance policy written some years ago by my parents. Divided equally with the three siblings was the directive. Dad pasted on 5/8/16 and I received a revised will possibly encouraged by my sister and her daughter. The original will I requested to review next week from the county/state filed told only that will exists. Revised will states Sis is only recipient, predeceased by Daughter and remaining proceeds left with daughters son. Question: Is the original valid? Being beneficiary are the proceeds mine to disperse. Is the revised (implied) my Father approved, valid?

anonymous310342 Jan 2016
I've paid all
The insurance premiums on my moms policy and she made me beneficiary when she was well. As it is I've spent more on premiums then the death benefit. She had verbally left her house to me as I am disabled although I own my own but my siblings sold sold it to move her closer to me. Now I live with her as this closer thing doesn't work. Some of my siblings contribute for assistance for help. I've done all the improvements on the house yet they feel they will get there money back when mom becomes an angel. I think whatever we bought the house for is the monies that should be divided amgonsyvthem. Not the current market value. I can never get back my time What do people think Am I being greedy ? I feel no guilt at all. This is a 24/7!hour job. No life.

sparkle50 Jan 2016
My father-in-law has named my husband and one sister as the sole beneficiaries to multiple life insurance plans, retirements accounts and bank accounts. He has also arranged for his home to go into both their names to be sold after his death and to split the money. I was not at the meeting with the attorney however my husband does not have any paperwork explaining the details and his sister has been updating the insurance plans removing two siblings he has essentially written off. The sister has told one sibling and has been setting items from the home aside for the father. She also stepped in during to help her parents while there brother was terminally ill and against his wished she became the sole beneficiary to 12,000. after his death. He did not get along with her and would have never done this on his own. I have since found a letter he wrote giving his assets to his nephews and nieces.(not going to go there). I recently noticed she is listed on her fathers checking and savings account as POA and my husbands name is not. Is there a way to be sure she did not remove everyone but herself as beneficiary? When her mother passed she was given 40,000 cash as well. There are 4 children - my husband and her take care of their father however she is very manipulative. She has cleared out anything worth value from the inside of the home however we are not to take anything without her present or she complains to her father.......who then threatens to write off my husband. Mentally he is not all there and I am worried she will do something to hurt us in the long run. This seems sad to ask however we have three children and spend all out time helping him and she only shows up occasionally and has recently talked her dad into allowing her medical power of attorney (telling him there can only be one) that said the nursing home confides in us because she makes decisions that are harmful for him like buying him hit fat sugary foods and not allowing them to check his blood sugar level now that he is diabetic with congestive heart failure. Can we call the attorney to ask for copies? Do we know that all plans are being shared between them?? She has given herself a lot of funds and been in control of the conflict with the two written off children. She has no children to support and no need to be greedy but is. Is there anything we can do?

N1K2R3 Jul 2011
A life insurance policy? Are you the sole beneficiary? If so, then the proceeds from the policy are yours and yours alone. No need to discuss much.

igloo572 Jul 2011
The money is yours, all yours.

If you are married and put it in a joint account, then it becomes community property. So think about that if that's your situation.

Depending on your state and the amount, you may have to pay tax on it.

If you think family may challenge her will, then I'd suggest putting it in a 1 yr CD -
they don't pay much, maybe 1.20% but is shows that you are prudent with $. Plus it gives you time to think about what to do with it that would make gran smile.
If you haven't gotten the $ yet, you may find the insurance co will approach you to put it into a CD and you get a few extra points on the CD if you do that.
Good luck.

anonymous31857 Jul 2011
What did her will say. My grandmother made my uncle beneficiery of her insurance but stated in her will that the money should be divided among the three siblings. Make sure that you abide by her wishes and stay fair and that in the end you can live with yourself. Good luck

jeannegibbs Jul 2011
My grandfather gave each of his sons a parcel of farm land when they married, and he gave each of his daughters cash for a downpayment when they bought their first house. If one daughter never bought a house, it would seem reasonable to me that if Grampa gave her something extra in his will or estate planning she shouldn't be expected to share it, any more than the sons shared their farmland or the other daughters shared their downpayment money.

W23456, enjoy your mother's last gift to you, without guilt, please.

AlwaysMyDuty Jul 2011
I agree with coach. You aren't obligated to share the money. If you can keep the money without feelings of guilt then you are ahead of the game.
My mother changed her will right before she died and left everything to my sister. I lived 8 mi from our mom, spent thousands of my own money when she ran short not to mention endless hours attending to her needs. We did not have a good relationship - ever - but I did it anyway because it was the right thing to do. My adult kids were right there with me. Mom died 11/30/10, my sister has yet to tell us. Sis' monetary contribution was small and very few hrs were ever spent helping our mother. She got everything. I guess she had no guilt whatsoever. I would've shared, had the tables been turned, but then we have a different outlook on things.

jeannegibbs Jul 2011
Lilliput, I think in this case the parent is trying to establish equity among what she gives her children. She has given items of material value to the other children along the way and feels she hasn't given a fair share to this child. Her way of evening things up is to make W23456 the beneficiary of her life insurance policy. Since that is the mother's goal and intention, I truly think that W23456 should honor it and accept it as the gift mother intended.

It is not clear from the question whether the mother is still alive or not. If she is, then the policy may well need to be used for her care down the road. If she has passed or has enough for her care without using this policy, then the life insurance payout belongs to W23456 when the time comes.

coach Jul 2011
Your mother named you beneficiary of the policy for a reason. It is your money. As others have said it is up to you as to if you share it with siblings or not. Just be sure you have no guilty feelings if you don't.

toadballet1 Jul 2011
I feel that a parents assets should be divided equally among all their children...this saves a LOT of grief and bickering down the road. Even though I have done the majority of my Mom's caregiving, I discouraged her from putting everything in my name. I didn't want any "squeaky wheels" coming at me after the fact.
However, when the parent is still alive ALL assets should be used for THEIR care. It is too premature and disrespectful to be thinking about inheritances while someone is still alive.
I have always helped my Mom with her finances. But never thought of any of her assets as beloning to me or my siblings.

LilliansBonnie Jul 2011
My Mom had her house put in a trust which was left to my sister and me in her will. I was the sole beneficiary of her bank account, which meant the money was all mine, just as an insurance policy would be. I just felt that I wanted to share the money with my sister, which I did. It is something you must feel right about.

jeannegibbs Jul 2011
Then by all means, this is her gift to you. Accept it gratefully.

W23456 Jul 2011
No one else knows of this policy she gave it to me. She had talked about the cars, house down payments and computers, college, etc that she had given others but none to me or my family, we were the only ones who never asked.

jeannegibbs Jul 2011
Legally? I don't think so.

Ethically? Do you know your mother's intentions? If she said something along the lines of "I'm listing you because I can trust you to be fair to the others," then I think you are obligated to be fair to the others. If she said, "I'm naming you because I've already given the equivalent to the others," or "I'm naming you because of your special needs," or anything else to indicate she clearly intended the policy payout to be exclusively yours, then, no, I don't think you are obligated to share.

If she made you the beneficiary at a time when you were the only one still her dependent and now none of you are dependents, your might consider sharing. In other words, if she simply hadn't gotten around to updating something that was clearly out of date, then perhaps you should take care of that oversight.

In my mind, I guess it comes down to carrying out your mother's wishes, or what your mother's wishes could reasonably be expected to be at the time of her death if she had given it thought.

Are other family members questioning the beneficiary designation at this time?

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