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smc9368 Asked February 2011

My mother in law has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and can no longer live on her own. Any advice on how to tell her we are moving her?

EXPERT Carol Bradley Bursack, CDSGF Feb 2011
Often getting the help of a third party helps. A doctor, clergy person or even a good friend can often assist. Be as gentle as possible and give her as many choices as possible. Show her ahead of the move where she will live, if you can, so you can help her envision her new surroundings. Stress that you'll still be there to help, but that her safety concerns are paramount, and she needs more help than you alone can give.

It's never easy, but a gentle approach is best, if possible. This is often traumatic for everyone. Remember that she is probably afraid.

Good luck with this hard move,
Carol

judy1 Feb 2011
Nothing I tried worked with my mother. The doctor spoke with her, my children talked to her but she just kept saying that she'll think about it or just NO she is perfectly capable of taking care of herself, she has been doing it for 89 years.... Logic doesn't work at this point, you just have to do what you have to do. In my case I put her into an ALF against her will. It was extremely tough at the beginning but now a year later it was the best thing I could have ever done, should have done it 3 yrs earlier....

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