Are there any programs that help with bills, or pay the family who is taking care of their disable, elderly mom?

I don't know of any programs that pay the family for caregiving, unless there is already a longterm care insurance policy with a rider already in place. But I am in Georgia and it could be different in your state. Here is what I would do... Check with your state Department of Aging or local Area Agency on Aging(every state has one). In Georgia, they are a part of the Department of Human Services, but each state sets them up differently. I would start with the Dept of Human Services and/ or the Department of Family and Children Services, and see if they will give you the phone number if you can't find it easily in the phonebook or on the internet. Good luck and God bless!