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T
therightthing Asked September 2010

With a DPA, can I make Mom move?

Mom is 90 yrs old. She has always been very strong willed; a teacher during her working yrs. She was an only child and is used to getting her own way. Mom is physically unable to care for herself at home. I moved in with her, at her request 2 yrs ago. I have Durable Power of Attorney.
She either can not or will not remember agreements that we have come to about money issues. She is now accusing me of stealing money from her. She accuses me of a lot of different things. Mom won't accept her situation and I know she is venting her frustrations on me. I knock myself out daily for her. I have given up so much to be here, taking care of her. I have no money of my own left as I have spent it all on her and fixing her home to make it safe.
I can't emotionally take care of her any more. She will not want to go to a Nursing Home. I can't leave her here in the house alone. There is no one in my family that can or will care for Mom 24/7. Am I stuck? Can I force Mom to move?

LynnPO Sep 2010
if you have durable Power of Attorney - the answer is yes. This situation you describe is the reason parents give PoA - it's a tough call but it must be done. I believe our parents give us PoA because they trust us to work for their best interest when the time comes - sounds like the clock has stuck. I know it's hard, but you can do it. You NEED to do it for both of you.
Best of luck, let us know how it goes.

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