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Dtflex Asked February 2010

Why do I get so annoyed when mom starts talking nonsense?

Mpm's greatest past time is to dig through drawers and old boxes. When she finds something insignificant she shows it to me and comes up with some ridiculous story about about it. It is always something that she has had in her possession forever and she has just forgotten about it. I get very annoyed and impatient with mom when she does this. I know this isn't going to stop so can anyone give me advice on how to deal with this?

Marie8888 Feb 2010
Mine too!! I used to look forward to weekends...now I look forward to Monday's.

Dtflex Feb 2010
Thanks Marie. Yes, mom lives with me. Maybe I am just annoyed that I had to miss work today to mom-sit since my help was sick today. My escape is going to work each day.

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Marie8888 Feb 2010
Is she living with you and you encounter this all day, every day??? If so, you need to get away from her for a period of time each week. My Mom lives with me and I know what you're going through. I can tolerate the first 50 times she repeats the same story or repeatedly asks me the same thing over and over. Sometimes I really get angry too. Then I have to get away and compose myself. I tell myself it's part of her dementia and she can't help it. But you know, we're only human and can take so much. Hang in there and take care of yourself!

bobbie321 Feb 2010
been there. Mom liked to tell me about everybody she told off. She's 89 so it's quite a list. It could get quite animated and dramatic and WAY annoying.

My mom was also a hoarder and the stories attached to the meaningless, troublesome crap were really tiring.

I would create diversions for myself when she started up 'I heard my phone...' and usually when I returned to the room she had forgotten about it.

The thing that I had to let go of was my mom trying to tell me stuff about when I was a baby. (I was adopted) Apparently there was a lot of drama and mom knew the players but never told me and of course now she can't tell me because it all comes out sideways since mom as aphasia. you can't make up or down out of it and it will make you nuts trying.

This is part of the 'crazy making' behavior of the disease and we have to do what we can to protect ourselves whether that's walking out of the room, screaming into a towel or hiding your mom's boxes!

I guess the hardest is to let go of it. We always listened to our moms and dads whether we did as we were told or not and now that they don't make any sense as they talk to us it's upsetting. That's one of the reasons I think it's so annoying to us.

You're not alone by a long shot. I bet a lot of caregivers will respond.

Good Luck,
Bobbie

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