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anonymous205154 Posted May 2014

Dementia, Sick and tired of this!

I hate dementia...I hate dementia...I want a divorce...I cannot do this..I will not do this..I WOULD RATHER BE DEAD! I am NOT going to do this...I am saving my money...I AM OUT the first chance I get....TO H*LL WITH DEMENTIA!

anonymous226569 May 2014
It's an illness of the brain. If you hate her for it, then she is better off elsewhere.
Karma.

anonymous158299 May 2014
dementia is a monster dusty. its pure and simply incremental insanity. staying with a demented spouse might be a possibility in some cases but what if you have a combative patient who resists your help ?
my ex is just hardheaded , ocd , with depressive issues and i could have never lived with it. couldnt imagine living with her to this day . the first time she rattled her tea glass, slammed the toilet seat , exhaled a cigarette loudly or any one of a million other passive aggressive acts she'd end up in the freezer .. she was / is pretty good looking too as long as she stays above - 10 degrees ..

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anonymous158299 May 2014
id divorce an abusive nut job but a wife who was kinkier than a sack of slinkys with 25 seconds of shortterm memory i could probably play that out for a while..

jeannegibbs May 2014
Hugs to you, dear Sherry. I hate dementia too! I hate it! I hated it in my husband, and I hate it in my mother. I would gladly have divorced the dementia, but unfortunately it was attached to my husband.

Is there anything in particular that inspired this vent? Are you having a particularly hard day? Are you considering placing your husband in an appropriate care center? I don't know your situation, I just know it is awful to lose your life partner one memory at a time. So hugs to you.

If you feel like talking about it, go ahead an give more details. If you just want to rant a bit, go right ahead!

gladimhere May 2014
Sherry, I understand the divorce if for no other reason than to preserve whatever resources that you may have remaining. There is a process called spousal impoverishment that is also used for the same purpose. Have you tried to find a facility for him? Do you have his POA with rights to place him if incapacitated? You can go to a website AVVO to pose your questions to attorneys , receive responses at no charge. The more you tell them about your situation the better the answers will be. Good Luck!

anonymous158299 May 2014
ive read a bit about mental illness and was surprised how many times divorce was offered as the solution. caring for a demented elder might be one wild animal but being in an emotional relationship with a nut case would probably result in your own insanity or worse ..
its common practice in the mental health field , when someone is admitted to a stress unit , keep your heads up cause not far away is an equally bent spouse ..
save yourself , those are my honest feelings on this issue based on the limited info youve provided ..

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