The biggest problem I have is that every time he awakes, he thinks it's morning and he wants his Hot Cocoa with Ice Cream.
The Hot Cocoa is ok because I use Ensure as the base and the added Ice Cream is Dairy and Calories. This has been going on for almost 2 years now with the Cocoa - it started when he came home from hospital Christmas 2015 and was dying. He came home to die.
Now he's living, 96 and his goal is to reach 100.
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We are dealing with Sundowning with my Dad and right now it's especially difficult. His lasts pretty much all night long and the worse part is dealing with bathroom needs. He doesn't seem to know HOW to but he knows it needs to happen. He will even try to get his walker handle to urinate then end up messing on himself (floor, where ever). He wears depends but will soak them or try to remove them during the need to urinate which leads to a mess.

We just need ways to deal with some of these major issues so keeping him with us won't physically/mentally drain all of us to the point of having to consider a nursing home. :(
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I'm a caregiver for a 95 year old with vascular dementia. We use CBD oil. All it takes is 2 tiny drops (about the size of rice) under the tongue. My gosh the difference this has made. Not all CBD oil is created equal. Please go to the "Realm of Caring" website and read up. We have only used Elixinol 3600 but I feel others will work just as well. CBD oil is legal in 50 states. It's natural and you can't overdose them. We have taken him off "ALL" of his medications that he was on for dementia. The CBD oil works better than any of the ones he's been on. I can't stress this enough.... please read about the benefits of CBD oil. We also make sure he has between 64-90oz of water everyday. Many times just making him drink a glass of water has snapped him out of his confusion. The medical industry knows this and is probably why they don't give them fluids anymore when they admit them to the hospital unless you beg them for it. You can read "You're Not Sick, You're Thirsty" or any of Dr. Batmanghelidj's other books, or even look him up on YouTube. Water is so important.
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PS: Daily exercise and keeping her up during the day means I don't need psychotropic meds or narcotics. In fact, I refuse to let her have any because it will increase her risk of falling. Daily walking has really helped her prevent falls. She can still fall but at least it's fairly rare and not weekly like it used to be -- when she wanders at night she is VERY dangerous because that's when she falls. So keeping up with this routine has kept her safe and I think she has a much better quality of life. She is still ambulatory and if I did not exercise her I guarantee she would have been long bed ridden.
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My mom sundowns--she is 87 and it's severe at night. I prevent it with caffeine. Late morning or early afternoon, I make a strong tea with 2 black tea bags and one green tea and mix with two round tablespoons of cocoa and a cup or two of soy milk. It helps keep her up during the day and she sleeps well at night. I also EXERCISE her daily--it took over a year but I got her to walk 3/4th of a half mile with her walker and we do this seven days a week during the morning. That keeps her confusion and wandering patterns down to a minimum. No better medicine than daily exercise.
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I would never even consider taking my Father out of the house after 3:00 (and now its getting closer to 2:00). The confusion riding in a car, following conversation, noise in a restaurant, etc. There is nothing better in his case than to relax to TV music, have someone near to answer his questions or to sit with him. I've learned from this blog, though, and I'm going to try the bright lights, no news (its a habit to him), and limit the naps in the PM. Thanks for this help...
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My mother 91, has copd and early NSCL. She eats breakfast, goes to bed and sleeps til 1:30, eats lunch, takes another nap, then eats dinner with us.....she stay up almost all night watching TV. Sometimes she will sleep for a hour or so at night, but then watches TV. Is this considered sundowners? or just sleeping her life away? She is on oxygen. doesn’t get enough and can’t remember jack!!!
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My husband had Parkinsons and the begining of Dementia and of course Sundowners. He was diagnosed with the disease 3 years prior to his death. He had Sundowners & possibly Parkinson for at least 20 years and they diagnosed it the Drs as nightmares. They sent him to sleep clinics and he had tests. There is really so little about these diseases that it seems is known. The Dr said it takes years sometimes before it may be diagnosed. He had trouble with his legs and eventually had to go to a nursing home as he could not walk. When he was home I would wake up , if I did get some sleep ! With his fighting unknown shadows or trying to hurt me. When i would tell him he was shocked and so I decided not to. I had put lights on and Blinds closed at early Eve. I made sure we were out everyday, but this was an every night thing. He would eat in the dining room of the nursing home , but he had outbursts and cursing etc.at all times, they seperated him .He became Dr Jekyl and MR Hyde ! He would try to hurt the aids and would punch and yell at them. Basically he was a quiet nice guy. Everyone liked him when he was okay. He never was nasty . These spells did not last more then a few short hours or minutes, but came on at all times of the day ! I was there everyday and watched how he changed during this time ! I hope someday they find a medicine to help as none of his did !It is a terrible way to remember someone you loved or cared for ! You have to be strong and support them !
Mrs Blue Eyes
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Adjusting to daylight savings changes is really hard. Mom still expects darkness when there's still a few hours of light left in the day. And vice versa in the fall. I began to notice her total silence at the dinner table - my first signal. She simply wasn't there, as much as I tried to start conversation. Thankfully she's still eating well, so that's good.

On the topic of dementia, how do caregivers switch gears when the elderly parents shows signs of dementia one minute, and totally normal the next? I have a hard time knowing how to react in situations - I have to stop and analyze her state of mind when she says something - then decide how to react? Easier said than done.
Maybe it's easy to be in denial about her dementia, and not accepting it when it happens?
Back and forth we go - all day - and it's emotionally painful for me. I will try to seek out a support group to talk and share these emotions.
I had a revelation yesterday, after Mom and I argues about her putting dirty dishes in the dishwasher instead of her simply running water over them and sitting them on a towel. She didn't know why she couldn't put them in the dishwasher...that's when it hit me this might be the dementia taking over the situation. No amount of logic or real talk could resolve anything. Part of me wanted to walk out and go back home. I'm super careful to ensure that the kitchen is clean and hygienic. We both eat off the dishes, not just her.But of course, it forced me to recognize her dementia and incorporate it in our life. My remedy is to make a list of all the things she can still do, and a list of those things she can't. The first list is much longer, thankfully. This is our new reality, though, and it took my changing, not Mom.
Taking it personally is a problem also...Mom couldn't change just because I requested it. It hurt as a daughter to have her disregard my well being.
So I am resigned to her "dishrinsing" but will put them all the dishwasher as they appear. Extra work for me, extra water being used, but at least her dishes will be sanitary and clean - safe for us both to use.
Sorry for the rambling and wandering topics!! It's SO HELPFUL to be able to vent and get other opinions, though, so thanks in advance:-)
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I found this article very enlightening, especially for caregivers. I only wish I had seen it when I was trying to care for my mom. I didn't know what "Sundowning" was until I talked with her doctor about her behaviors at this time of day. At first, I felt bad because I used to think she was just being difficult. After I knew what it was and why it was happening, I came up with different ways of talking to her, taking her shopping, rides; anything that would help her to not be so agitated as well as to help her sleep better. The one thing I really had trouble with was the hallucinations that she had. I did find it better to go along with it than to try to make her understand that it was just her imagination. I also found that talking to her about her past was a great help, because she could remember things of long ago, while the short term memory was very frustrating to her as well as myself. Thank you for sharing this article with us. Even though my mom passed almost three years ago, I hope that those of you who are dealing with this will find it very helpful. I enjoy this site very much, and everyone here has a gift to share with all of us. Life's experiences are so helpful to others and cannot be compared to trying to learn it from a book. Keep on sharing your stories and experiences.
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I have been my mom's caregiver for nearly 8 years and have gone through most of all the stages of Alzheimer's with her (she actually is diagnosed with vascular dementia). It's been a hard road and a very overwhelming and depressing road but I've gotten through it. I've learned that when they are experiencing the sundowning syndrome it's always best to keep the shades down during the day so as not to confuse them more when the sun actually goes down. I've watched her eyes when there has been inclement weather or believe it or not a full moon and it almost looks like she's was short-circuiting . I've learned never to contradict her when she says things that don't make sense or sees characters when no one is there and make everything into a game. I found that getting her coloring books would distract her from her surroundings. Compliments on her achievements when she colored something regardless if it was just scribble was always well accepted. I avoided crowded places in the evening and tried keeping her within a familiar environment where she felt safe always kept her calm. She is now in the late stages of dementia and her physical and mental states are childlike. Music is a great soothing method. Lastly a few years back I found a doll that sang snippets of all her childhood songs in Spanish and she loves it - carries it around with her and rocks it to sleep.
Alzheimer's is a very a sad disease for both the person experiencing it and the caregiver. rosme922
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