It's natural to want to deny that someone you love may have dementia, but it's so important to watch for the signs you've listed in order to get an effective treatment plan started.
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Caring for a loved one with Alzheimer's or another type of dementia is so challenging, and it's so important for family members to arm themselves with as much education as possible in order to provide the best care.
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Days are very trying these days, when it comes to Caring for my mother..I live with her and take care of her around the clock, hardly ever getting a break and get away to have time for myself. She and my siblings don’t seem to think I should be tired and exhausted to the point I need a break. Often it is 2-3 weeks before I get away for a few hours to unwind and get myself together.
My mom says hateful things to me all the time, doesn’t do anything for herself and I have to do everything for her. I have no time to take care of myself, because every time I leave the room, she needs or wants something, whether she really does or not. I understand she is in a wheelchair, an amputee, but is capable to do a lot and just won’t. I don’t get a moments rest. I have my own health issues and it is physically hard for me most of the time and so wore out all the time. The family doesn’t even try to get me help for a break. I have given up my job and my own place to take care of her and am losing my vehicle due to no income coming in and no way to pay my own bills..I feel lost in life and that my needs or feeling don’t matter! I don’t know what to do, but I do know I can’t continue doing this, I just want to give up on everything..
Thanks for listening to my venting, would love to hear some suggestions for what I can do to make things better.
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Mom has a pacemaker and cannot have an MRI. The neurologist ordered catscans of the brain which show significant deterioration in the brain. Mom had refused to take the neurological testing for Alzheimer’s. The doctor at this point said we will treat her for dementia because all of her symptoms indicate that. We agree and have felt she has had it for about 5 years and the Dr concurs looking at her symptoms and scans. The Dr said it’s ok not to do further testing if it will cause her further agitation. She has said she will not do any more tests. Has anyone dealt with this?
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My dad ask me who my wife’s husband was..
He ask wo that boy ( my son) is that keeps wandering around the house..
He ask when I moved from Kansas I’m 49 he moved me and my brothers here 42 years ago..
He gets confused who I am
I’m horrified
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My grandmother's doctor is diagnosing her with Alzheimer's and dementia. He says that she had it before her car accident but after the accident it caused it to accelerate 10x's. Before the accident my grandmother lived at home by herself with little to no help from anyone else. She was able to keep her house immaculate & pay all of her bills on time. I don't understand this.
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In need, you probably should start a new thread and add details of the symptoms and your situation. There are too many docs as well as laypeople who think that because a person can converse a little and sounds OK for the duration of an office visit, everything must be fine... advice would depend on what kind of doctors you have already seen and what tests have been run already.
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So what if your parent has a lot of the symptoms but has been told by doctors that they do not have AD or dementia or MS. They have tested negative for Lyme. All the one doctor can offer is that it may be stress related. What now? Where do we turn to? I need a doctor who can help.
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I recognize all of these warning signs as my husband died of Alzheimer. But when the first warning signs showed up, he was barely 50 years old, and just had suffered from Leukemia. When I told the G.P. and the cancer specialist about his strange behavior they all stated that he was depressed, in anxiety of getting the cancer back, suffered from burn out, because he still tried to go working, aso. No one never would admit he had a type of dementia or Alzheimer. After 2 to 3 years I was so fit up, that I went to a specialized clinic where he had to pass tests. 5 times he went for 2 hours. A week later, I got the results. My husband suffered from Alzheimer disease, despite his young age. I have read many books then from the big city library, who have books of all kinds, and effectively had to admit that he had all the signs of an early stage Alzheimer. In total, he lived 14 years with this terrible brain killing disease. But it is better to know the soonest possible. Then you can understand why he is confused, can not find proper words, gets angry very soon (stage that they realize something is wrong with them) mix up places and events, forget names of family members etc... And people also change in a different way. I knew a woman who was happy with everything all the time, and when I had work to do, I put her in an easy chair with cushions all over, put a fur toy in her hands and she looked to disney films the whole time. She never got up and started walking around and taking things, no, she kept looking at the tele. My husband on the contrary had always been a happy man, was never nervous or angry. But after a couple of years he turned out to be very aggressive, calling me names.. telling me that I had a lover, and lots more of ugly things. Fortunately by then I knew that he was not aware of what he was saying, so I was only very sad, but never angry with him. And that had been the case before I knew he had Alzheimer disease. So, I repeat, the sooner you know, the better. Wish you lots of strength and certainly don't wait too long for calling in some professional help by specialized people for washing him, clothing him, brushing his teeth, combing his hair etc.. Big hug from Belgium
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JustMoi, you are describing very familiar things that go with the progression of dementia. It is very sad, but educate yourself on it, a lot of people recommend the Teepa Snow videos on the subject. Sorry this is happening, and glad she gets some pleasure out of life at least at the Senior Center! Check out any possible medical conditions that can be corrected that may contribute, and do much, much more gentle redirecting and distracting that arguing. It's hard. I have a feeling she is very blessed to have you in her life, even if she does not always realize it!
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So my mother-in-law is a great lady.
At first she would speak and just forget what she was saying, then go onto another subject.
Flash now to 3 months later.....
-She says things, yet 5 min later doesn't remember saying it
-She loses things a lot
-She gets bitter/mad at my husband (she lives with us) because he tries to help her. I guess you always hurt the ones you love
-She wont bathe/shower. will go to sleep in her clothes
-She left her husband, didn't want to be with him, moved in with her oldest son
-Now she yells at her son telling him she doesn't want to be there. hates it there
-Next day she is fine

The thing that gets me: she went to a Family Doctor in town. He was floored that the son is doing it on his own (he does have a friend come in to watch her when he goes to work at times). The doctor said he was making an appt. for her to have a scan of her brain and analysis. THIS wont happen for a few weeks and the next specialist is a few months. So what do we do?

She has a place she goes to with other Seniors and she loves it.
She gets to sing, dance etc. that is 2-3 times a week. at least she gets out and meets some great people.

It's so sad. She used to be so independent.
She will lose things ie; purse, shoes and go on a rampage when she cant find them. sometimes those items are IN her hand.

Any advice?
We are in MISSOURI
Thanks :)
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I was getting to the point where i was forgetting words, it scared me. My daughter told me to get a puzzle book and do some every day, that is what did and the problem went away. I still believe my friend brought on the dementia herself but than I believe we have control of most things that happen to us.
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Nsaids & Ibuprofen and Naproxen, Motrin, as well as Tylenol have put me in cardiac arrest. BECAREFUL with drugs. I also suffered drug induced hepatitis from the use of these drugs. "They" found out that morphine is the only thing I can take with out any trouble. Right-like I'll live on MS-I think not.Just eating ginger daily will act as a natural anti-inflammatory. I suffer from crippling arthritics & if I do not get up & take my ginger & take it through out the day, I am in such pain but the ginger covers it all as well as it is so good for digestion. Why mess with drugs. We are such a pill popping society. So much can be done with natural ways. Just try 100% natural lemon oil on cold sores & they will be gone with in a matter of hours. It is not acidic. It works in just the opposite way.
We so need to get into eating correctly & away from all the medications we are given.
The large corporations that live off of the pills that society pops daily will not tell you this, but I will & it is scientifically backed up. Being in the medical profession, I have to back up what I say.
Taking meds to decrease inflammations is not the way I believe but to eat right.

Look at some of the commercials on TV about drugs with such nice music playing, beautiful pictures of happy people & even some movie stars that indorse the meds in the back ground while you are being told that this or that drug may cause death & an entire array of health problems?? Are we stupid???

This is not the way to prevent Dementia or Alzheimer diseases. EAT RIGHT. Educate yourself.
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I don't think that much of Alzheimer's is fully preventable with current knowledge. She might have gotten lazy and done less because of the dementia rather than the other way around. They do think that staying mentally active and physically active helps reduce the risk of most kinds of dementia but its not totally clear how much. Possibly anything that reduces inflammation is good in this regard - eating well and moving more definitely do that, and there are some studies suggesting that use of aspirin or NSAIDs like ibuprofen and naproxen may be helpful that way. We need something better though, for sure!
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My gripe is that one hears that Alzheimer's , at times,can be prevented. I look at all the well educated people and t hose who are still activity involved that get Alzheimer's and it bothers me, after all we had a president with the disease. Dementia, ay least the kind my friend had, could have been prevented. She was always lazy but as she aged she became more so, she didn't want to go for walks, she had never been reader and spent most of her time watching TV. She cooked less and less and while never a good housekeeper it became worse. I am an old woman and there is always the possibly of Alzheimer's but no dementia, not if I can help
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OMG, that is SO true. The genes you have do a lot of interesting things, but absolutely, you change things by what YOU do with them. Genes may make one person have side effects that most people don't have, or mean a drug will or won't work for you, genes may increase your risks and determine which of the "healthy" things you can do will have the most benefit, but YOU choose to do those things or not. I am totally enthralled with studying genetics at this point, both for myself and my patients - to me, it's like getting a peek at the blueprints, and a constant reminder that we are "fearfully and wonderfully made." Hugs!
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I need to correct what I said-it is now being shown that genetics DO NOT play the role we thought & food & genetically energized food especially, can change things in your body. I have no idea of your age. I am 68 & very active with all I can in this day & time.
( I did mean to say in paragraph 2 that genetics are now showing & proving that they do not play the role we initially gave to them. We can change ANYTHING we can imagine-Just stay on the y6ellow brick road for lace of a better thing to0 say & leave you with....) I just go to fast sometimes....
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Vstefan-Where do I start-with my husband-I think not-I have as an R.N. worked with they all blend together.So many Dementia patients as well as Alz. Patients-People are people & all have souls & as soon as we can look & see the LIGHT with in, of the soul for it all goes together-I know not how to separate the mind, body & spirit-nor do I wish to.
I go on that we are all one & a reflection of the ONE. I also go on years of living this stuff, traveling around the country, lecturing, doing what I can.

I hear your concerns about health & all I can say is that -Look at what you eat & any meds your on. It is not being proven that genetics can be changed. I know this to be true & I know no thing??
My hu8sband was a life long painter & is rather ill now. I have dealt with all types of Dementia as well as Alz.-they do blend together & I have not much faith in the medical profession, which comes from my experience of life & my work.
Thanks for your kind words.
Blessing Be...
ohmoondance
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Solvent dementia would be a cause of pre-senile dementia that is thought to be caused by exposure to organic toxins. Is that what you are having to deal with in your loved one? My mom had vascular, my dad had vascular and/or FTD. It bugged me that one of his docs felt it didn't matter what kind he had - well shoot, as his only daguther, I'd kind of like to know if it could have been an autosomal dominant hereditary form. A real common thing is that folks with non-Alz types because they recognize familiar people are often consdered "sharp as a tack" and that slows down recognition of the problem and increases guilt and decreases ability to recognize when you have to take over and deal with stuff.

Your posts are fine! Most all of get a correction and an education on here from time to time, I sure have.
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If I am not here to reach out & help someone-I need to get off this site.

I offer support, some answers that I have found in the beginning of the disease & in the progression of it all. I kind of think that 40 plus years speaks for itself & several degrees(in the medical profession) to go with it all. Not tooting my own horn, just living life as it is handed to me. I am here to serve & that is it.
If this is of no help to anyone-tell me & I'll be gone.
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Any way you look at it , dementia affects cognitive ability & neurological functioning

"Dementia just means loss of intellectual capacities from any cause." to quote you-What is Solvent Dementia then?? Live with it , deal with it daily & then lets talk. I refuse to disagree over words. That is my trip-not yours....We really are on the same page. It's difficult any way you look at it. Education is where it is at & we find out new things daily. DAILY.
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Well, um...this is confusing. Alzheimer is actually a subtype of dementia; dementia can be vascular, frontotemporal or other genetic, or Lewy body also. Dementia just means loss of intellectual capacities from any cause. As a generalization, Alzheimer is related to the pathology of having neurofibrillary tangles and excess tau proteins, and disproportionally affects both short and long-term memory, while some of the other types have poor judgement and more short term than long term memory issues, with relatively preserved long term memory and recognition of familiar people, sometimes even better orientation to date and time, etc.
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Dementia is a form of Alzheimer's. Dementia can be just as devastating. Just look it up & study from many sources or hit a medical Psy. book. They manifest the same. Dementia can move slower sometime, sometimes.... This is over 40 years of experience working in the profession; working with the mentally ill.
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anything out there to help is so welcome for when you care for someone who is mentally ill with Dementia, you can get real crazy too. Been there, still have the t-shirt. Still wear it :)
It is my journey.
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being an R.N. in Psychiatric care for over 40 years & having a husband who suffers from Solvent Dementia, I have learned that it is my journey to understand rather then to be understood. It is a long difficult road & sometimes I believe that it is not so bad to forget. You must have support & can not do it alone. To watch the person you love not be able to show emotion but fear, to be scarred of the one who walks with them, is very heavy duty. I don't cry as much as I use to & I will never leave him & even though he forgets me at times-I NEVER FORGET HIM.
I have had 2 children die in the past 5 years. Maybe I am just numb?? I know not.
I just know it is my journey & I AM TO SERVE.
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Awesome info! This would help me know more about Alzheimer's and Dementia. It's better to know the symptoms ahead to have a chance of having an earlier prevention. Thanks for sharing!
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There is a really good thread about vascular dementia that just started on here by Kazaa, called "Vascular dementia what can I expect?" It is worth a read.
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Alzheimer's is a specific kind of dementia with neurofibrillary plaques and tangles, and tends to affect memory both short and long term severely and early; its is the one where familiar loved ones are unlikely for no longer be recognized after a point. Vascular, fronto-temporal and Lewy body dementias are different in some ways from that. Many times dementia is asscoated with other physical impairments and loss of physical abilities eventually develops, but early on you can be cognitively very impaired but still physically able to get up and mobilize...actually that may be more common in Alzheimer's type, but I am not sure. People often go through a time of being physically able to locate the car keys and try to drive, even though completely unsafe to sdo so, for example
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For Hannah160 and DDESONGS, both your moms sound like they have a more vascular or frontotemporal dementia. Social skills and judgement tend to go before long term memory, but short term does get impaired too. I have to agree it makes NO sense that someone who is impaired enough in judgement to need a guardian can't be better protected from themselves. I hate to be harsh, but, it will progress to the point of being unable to access alcohol on her own - maybe just cognitively getting worse, maybe due to a fall - and you may want to stay in charge though right now you really are hitting your head on the wall.
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Correct me if I am wrong but i thought alzheimer's was deterioration of the body as well as the mind,while dementia only affected the mind. I have a friend who has very serious dementia but physically she is quite healthy.
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