How do you get someone with dementia who is not washing their hair to agree to let you either wash it or take them to the salon?

This is what is called "self neglect", which is one of the hardest types of neglect to deal with. Try a different person to attempt to wash the hair. If living at home, you may want to hire a home health aide to come in just for that twice a week. In care facilities, it is common to have a different worker wash residents if that worker is successful in doing so when self neglect is happening. Sometimes, those with dementia start to fear water. Sometimes just being upbeat and positive about the task can help as well.

Your profile doesn't indicate how advanced the dementia is. Does this person resist care in other ways or not? It's tough when someone with dementia resist care. I'd try a number of things and see what might help. Does she allow help with her baths? If so, could one be done then with a casual suggestion? Such as bring in a lovely fragranced shampoo and say that it worked great for you and you would love for her to try it as a treat. Or, you could say that the doctor prescribed it and put shampoo in container that looks official from pharmacy. Or, you could hire bath tech. Sometimes, the patient is more willing to work with professional. They often have techniques that work well. If she's resisting care in other areas of care as well, I'd explore other options for hands on care.

My mother doesn't like going to the salon when it's noisy any more, so we are often there at opening on a weekday when there's only a couple of patrons.

My mom uses shampoo wipes, similar to large body wipes, about once a week. They're called No Rinse Aqua Shampoo Gloves, and are currently $9.45 for 12 on Amazon.

The shampoo cap works very well for my husband. They are expensive but I only use one once a month. I get mine at Walgreens. Watch their flyer for sales.

Lifestudent, with or without dementia, as we age we find just taking a shower and washing our hair can be exhausting. To me it feels like I had a workout at a gym [use to be a gym rat]. I can't imagine how it will be as I get on in years.

Ask if the person would mind if you wash their hair. I don't know how comfortable the person would be in they are in the shower letting you do this. I remember way back when people use to wash their hair the kitchen sink. For an older person this may be physically uneasy.

How here's an idea, try a "no rinse shampoo cap". I heard this works pretty good. I believe Walmart sells them.