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tto123 Posted August 2010

I feel very guilty in having mother at 80-years-old to take the radiation therapy for advanced cancer treatment in suffering the pain more.

tto123 Aug 2010
Really appreciate for your comments and support. Once again thanks all for valuable inputs.

toadballet1 Aug 2010
tto: I sympathize with you entirely. Ever since I became responsible for Mom's care I question every medical decision I help her make. But in the end all caregivers are doing what they think is best at the time, by relying on the doctor's input. When it goes well, everyone is happy - when it doesn't, we take on all the guilt.
I think that the hardest thing I have ever done was to try and help my Mom when she has been in severe pain. Medical people have learned to "block out" a patient in pain because they have to do their job. But I am not a medical person, and it is so very difficult to watch your loved one suffering.
A dear aunt of mine had terminal cancer. She did do some of the treatments, but finally decided she wanted to reach the end of her life in a more "natural" way. I think that was one of the bravest things I've ever heard. Hospice came in to help and she died they way she lived; in complete dignity.
My thoughts and prayers are with you...you are doing the very best you can.
Lilli

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tto123 Aug 2010
She does not really know that it is adanced cancer, but she kind of know and she didn't really want to take the therapy. Nonetheless, she has completed the therapy with our asking and I feel guilty as we do not see significant improvement with such hardship in RT.

tto123 Aug 2010
Appreciate for your comment and we are trying our best in having to feel the comforts she needs.

LynnPO Aug 2010
This is a tough situation and I can empathize. My father had radiation as part of a palliative care program. Though it caused some discomfort it kept tumors in his lungs from growing larger and prevented even MORE pain. We spoke at length to his doctors about treatments to give him the best quality of life and prevent pain NOT CURE him. We knew an attempt to CURE would cause suffering and would not be worth it. I hope you can find a good medium area for your mom so that she's comfortable and capable for as long as possible.

NancyH Aug 2010
What does your mother say about this? Did she NOT want to go thru radiation?

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