I am taking in my friend who was dumped in a nursing home. She is about 8 years older than me with copd and a cancer survivor. She has over 6 kids who don't want to be bothered with her. She worked all her life for them. Sad. I had two children. One died. The other is helping me care for my friend. Love each other. Life is short.

The friends and family part of this is idealistic and seems something for a bygone world. Aside from my husband, the only help I found was from professionals, especially the hospice team. Friends are runners.

I was told that caregivers other than a spouse can get paid for their time when they take care of someone. Is this true?

To find a geriatric care manager (Aging Life Care Manager™) for your team, visit www.aginglifecare.org to locate an expert in your area.

There is no help from the government unless you are poor and on welfare, SSI, Medicaid, or you get zip. Dementia folks require "custodial care," not skilled care, and health insurance won't pay. Simple. Factual.