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Am I the only one who would be content to be thrown in a ditch when I die? I'm one of the youngest members of my generation, and most of the others live rather far away and don't travel much. (I don't have descendants.) My friends are scattered around the country and world. Even after people are buried, people are expected to landscape and maintain the graves--I feel no need to burden anybody who cares with a long-term "chore". I'd rather see people spend the time and effort being kind and caring to people when they're alive.
Having said the preceding, I'll probably just donate my body to medical research and then be cremated with nothing done with the remains, and no other followup.
Well I can honestly say traditional funerals are definitely more and yes you should make arrangements prior pre- planned and make payments. I just got a letter saying about the costs of funerals and yes they go up each year. My mother is 92 with dementia and my parents did not have life insurance and for my father we paid out of pocket. I do think its better to have it pre-planned and make payments due to the increase cost each year. I believe, cremation is better because it seems you have more choices and less expense but it is your preference and the wishes of your loved ones.
Hello. I am a caregiver, and am in charge of question number (1). The person has a policy that does not cover his burial, however I did take out a small policy that may not finalize the event. I am looking for a place to bury him with 1 more policy. Hope I can succeed n this endeavor. Pre-planned is easier.
I just buried my husband 5 weeks ago after a long illness. He was a veteran and we had already decided because of cost we both wanted to be cremated. Even with that there was a bill of over $3000.00. He was buried in a National Veteran'S Cemetery in a niche in the Columbarium. The VA supplied the plot, the headstone, the entire service including a Gun salute, minister , flowers and a memorial flag. We paid for the cremation, transport from the house to the funeral home as he passed away at home, and transport of the urn to the cemetery for the service, as well as the urn, small vials for his ashes as our children wanted some of those, and certified death certificates. We can apply to the VA for reimbursement of some of the funeral costs. I must say that when I opened the check book, the funeral director asked if we had insurance. When I said yes, he said not to worry about money until the insurance paid. How people who have no insurance could ever afford a funeral, but the cost of the creamtion is definitely less expensive.There was a book of caskets and urns and some of the caskets were sevseral thousand dollars!!!
Most folks don't know that embalming is not required for a burial. It IS for a viewing or what folks refer to as a wake. I have written pre-need contracts where a ground burial is the same price as a cremation/visitation/memorial service. We find cremations do not always give closure. It's recent popularity has proven to inflate pricing dramatically. (I had nine years in the business, Community Services Director and Family Services Counselor for two of the largest providers in the industry.) #4 above is not true. They are comparing a general garden to a private estate. #5 is too vague. Modern memorial parks have cremation gardens and ossuaries (burial for modest means) for cremains, complete with name plates, etc. It's when a loved one has what's called a Direct Cremation, and people bring the urn home that there can be complications in the future: granddaughters with five to seven urns they lug around when moving, etc. It can be a burden. Something to think about.
My mother suffered from dementia and has recently passed this was and is very hard on our family. As we were helping my father make funeral arrangements we all had sticker shock at the cost. Our first questions was how can people possibly pay for funerals. the answer was alot of people pre-plan/pay, those that don't have to pay in full before the service can be performed. We are a very close family and we knew what our mother would have wanted which made the decisions easier. but I will tell you there were alot of decisions to make, and when your grieving over a loved one some of those decisions can be very costly. The experience prompted my father to make arrangements regarding his own. and to start his own pre-planned funeral arrangements. This also means he can start making monthly payments now. Otherwise the funeral home will expect the full payment before your loved can be buried. I strongly encourage looking into all of that now and discussing your wishes with your family. Unfortunetly this is one of those subjects no one likes to discuss, but not having a plan can cost you big money. You should also ask about plots, they will convince you to buy two plots but you can bury up to three per plot, this cuts down on the cost as well. Also keep in mind if you are a veteran or spouse of a veteran you can be buried in a VA cemetary at no cost for the funeral, the only cost is the casket, flowers. There are alot of questions to ask and why it is important to talk about this now and not when emotions can judge your decisions.
Thank you for publishing this interesting article. All too often, in my elder law practice, I stand at a funeral home at a sparsely attended funeral service. It is not so much that the deceased's friends did not care, as the fact they did not have transportation to attend the viewing and funeral. My most memorable clients were a) one who established a scholarship fund with the money that would have been used for a funeral. b) one who put up the annual seed money for a tennis tournament to be held in his name each year at the local park. Participants pay to play in the event open to everyone of all levels and the money is used to improve the tennis program at the local park. c) The most memorable "celebration of life" was a client who made plans in advance which included rental of a hall for an entire afternoon. The event was catered, she provided money to transport anyone who needed a cab to attend. She enlarged photos taken during her entire life and had mementoes set up along the tables in the room so you could review the events of her life as though you were in a museum. A minister was hired. Stories were traded. Memories rekindled. The total cost of the affair was much less than a conventional funeral. I also encourage clients and friends to read the information at the Funeral Consumer's Alliance (www.funerals.org) to help in planning. As an elder lawyer I say my clients are all courageous enough to admit that they die some day, and probably become frail in the later years. It does take a lot of courage, but since we will all die, we should all pre-plan our funeral.
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
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I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
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You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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5 Essential Differences Between a Burial and a Cremation Service
Having said the preceding, I'll probably just donate my body to medical research and then be cremated with nothing done with the remains, and no other followup.
I also encourage clients and friends to read the information at the Funeral Consumer's Alliance (www.funerals.org) to help in planning.
As an elder lawyer I say my clients are all courageous enough to admit that they die some day, and probably become frail in the later years. It does take a lot of courage, but since we will all die, we should all pre-plan our funeral.