Back when I had a serious illness [cancer] and wasn't able to go out shopping or visiting with friends, my friends pretty much disappeared. I know I probably was sounding like a pity party whenever they did call, but that was pretty much my world at the time. I was scared. I was terrified. I needed a shoulder to cry on. I needed someone to listen to me.

For me what I found that worked best was someone saying "that's terrible, it must really suck to be where you are" which helped to open up the dialog.... instead of someone sounding sing songy saying everything is going to be fine :P