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Marlis, I cannot imagine what you are going through... having a conversation like that would drive ME over the edge. Next time Charlie talks about a dental appointment, just tell him you will call the dentist next week to set up an appointment [even though you had already done so], and leave it at that. Smile, hug him, and walk away.
My Dad is starting to obsess over certain items, such as a certain dollar amount that is in his new health insurance account. I must have heard that story several dozens times because his health insurance is now with a new vendor after being with the same vendor for decades. Dad doesn't like change, apparently.
Windyridge, that memory clock with all the information sounds great. I think I will get my Dad one because I believe that since each day is identical to the day before, he is probably losing track of time.
I'm new to your blog but Charlie sounds much like my dad , "charlie". You may have already discovered them, but memory clocks can make a huge difference for people with dementia. It changed my dads life profoundly when I got him one of these clocks. It has the time,day month and year in big letters you can see from across the room. My dad loves it and it helps him stay oriented all day long.
I've often wanted to take the calendar away too, but I know it will make the confusion worse.. The only thing she rights on it is the time she takes 1 of her pills twice a day.. I can't write appts on there, I have to spring those on her last minute or she will obsess about the up coming appt which would cause panic attacks..
So you're not the only GRUMPY caregiver out there...LOL
yes, my father also gets fixated on certain things, like counting his money every couple of days, it bothers my mother and then she gets mad. I told her due to them growing up in depression he wants to make sure he has plenty for them to live on. and the calendars, they have one in every single room, the kitchen has 3 but yet he never knows what day it is. even though I tell my mother to put an X on the day when they go to sleep, oh she does, but only on HER calendar. and clocks, yep there is one in every room except for the bathroom.
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
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I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
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APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
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You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Charlie’s Mission is to Make Me Grumpy—And He Does a Good Job
My Dad is starting to obsess over certain items, such as a certain dollar amount that is in his new health insurance account. I must have heard that story several dozens times because his health insurance is now with a new vendor after being with the same vendor for decades. Dad doesn't like change, apparently.
Windyridge, that memory clock with all the information sounds great. I think I will get my Dad one because I believe that since each day is identical to the day before, he is probably losing track of time.
So you're not the only GRUMPY caregiver out there...LOL