I've even told my parents that they would have MORE freedom by living in the retirement community than living in their single family house. Freedom to come and go as they please instead of waiting for me to rearrange my work schedule to take them shopping or to the doctor.
Now if Dad grumbles that he and Mom would starve if I didn't get them their groceries, I would say "no you wouldn't, if you lived in Ashby Ponds you and Mom could take the community bus to the grocery store every day, even just to get out of the house".
Dad grumbles about wanting to go to the bank, or the barber, or even eating out "gee Dad is you were at Ashby Pond they have a bank, barber, restaurants on-site, close enough to walk to".
And if they had moved to said community we would all have MORE quality time together, instead of me rushing here or there, pick up this or that, scheduling appointments, running to the grocery store, etc. to a point where I am just too tired to stop by and sit a spell.
I couldn't even get my parents to get in the car to drive over to view a wonderful resort type retirement village.... I would bet if my Dad saw the indoor swimming pool he would be sold. Dad said the "brochure looked great, maybe in a couple of years". COUPLE OF YEARS?? Hello, you and Mom are 92 and 96.
A year later Dad said downsizing isn't easy, ok I could understand that. For a solid year Dad has been going through file drawer after file drawer of papers to see what to toss out, and today he hasn't even touch the tip of that iceberg.
I bet i would be moving into that retirement community long before my parents even think about moving :P
Another idea I have, would be to see if there is anyone living in the community you want to tour that your parent already knows, like someone from her faith community or a former neighbor. If that person could meet your parent at the car and lead the first part of the tour it might put your mom at ease.
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Senior Living Tours: What to Do When an Elder Refuses to Get out of the Car
Now if Dad grumbles that he and Mom would starve if I didn't get them their groceries, I would say "no you wouldn't, if you lived in Ashby Ponds you and Mom could take the community bus to the grocery store every day, even just to get out of the house".
Dad grumbles about wanting to go to the bank, or the barber, or even eating out "gee Dad is you were at Ashby Pond they have a bank, barber, restaurants on-site, close enough to walk to".
And if they had moved to said community we would all have MORE quality time together, instead of me rushing here or there, pick up this or that, scheduling appointments, running to the grocery store, etc. to a point where I am just too tired to stop by and sit a spell.
A year later Dad said downsizing isn't easy, ok I could understand that. For a solid year Dad has been going through file drawer after file drawer of papers to see what to toss out, and today he hasn't even touch the tip of that iceberg.
I bet i would be moving into that retirement community long before my parents even think about moving :P