I don't have good feelings towards Hospice. All that do I guess you are blessed. Before I became sick myself,from age 19 to 30's, I worked as a Geriatric nurse in a Nursing Home with some Patients in Hospice. I don't find it just by coincidence that 4 different people with 4 different illnesses died shortly after starting Morphine( Hospice's favorite drug to give).First was my father which was not so bad because he had colon cancer that moved all through his body.He died about a week after they started Morphine. The 2nd was my Mother in Law she had Lupus and heart failure( HF was not in end stages) The Hospice nurse kept recommending Morphine not for pain but to make it easier to breath.If you know anything about Morphine it does not work well in older/sick people. Morphine will just keep building up in their system until it basically OD's them. I believe this is what took place with my Mother in Law. Then just 2 months ago my Grandmother that was living in a Nursing Home with Alzheimer's & Dementia my sister who thought it was a great idea to put her into hospice. I told her right from the start do NOT let them give Grans Morphine unless she gets to be in a lot of pain. My Grandmother did not say she was in pain, her biggest issue was her memory and trouble walking.She was 96! Suddenly my Grandmother went from being up everyday at breakfast until after dinner, to not wanting to get up at all, no longer talking or eating for 3 days. Then my sister decides to tell me she let Hospice start giving her Morphine 3 days before. The Next night my Grandmother died. The Next was just a week ago.. My Mother. About 4 months ago she had her right leg amputated because of diabetes and infection. She was getting along pretty well with just one leg when suddenly the same type of infection started with her left leg. Long story short I just think her Dr didn't want to do anymore for her to have the same result as the right leg. He recommended we use Hospice/Palliative care for her and he also refused to continue to be her Dr no matter what we did. It was documented in my mother's records that she was allergic to Morphine. I was very clear with the Hospice nurse about this from the very start. My mother made me swear I would not let them give her Morphine. My sister was aware of this as well. My mother still had her mind to her, just some days she was a little confused. She signed the Hospice papers for ME to make any medical decisions for her, she felt I knew more from being a nurse then my sister did. Also I told her what my sister did with Hospice and Morphine with my Grandmother before my Mother was in the same place. I also insisted to take my mother to her home not admit her to a Hospice facility as my sister wanted. Just a few things with me in my 40's, I have heart failure,diabetes, and in a wheelchair from a spine issue which I'm in pain 24/7 and take strong medications. I'm still not sure how I did it but I took care of my mother every day except on Monday & Tuesday my sister would stay with her so I could go to my house just a block away and get in my bed to rest. The Hospice called me that Monday afternoon to let me know she would be by to see my mother around 1 or 3pm and maybe but sure the Hospice Dr may come see her as well. This just did not seem right to me because over the last month she had been seeing my mother she let me know almost the exact time she would arrive and it was always on Thursdays before. She knew I went home on Monday. She also told me from the start most like the Hospice Dr would not come out to see a patient in Palliative care unless they were doing very poorly. I had not even been home very long that day, but after that call I just could not rest and decided to call my Son to take me back down to my Mothers. I get there and the Hospice nurse, Hospice Dr and my sister standing around looking like a deer in the headlights. I asked what was the latest about my mother or what was the reason the Hospice Dr could show up? The Hospice nurse tells me that my mother verbally told them she would take the Morphine. I told them right away I knew that was not true that she would never knowingly take it.I said i will go talk to my mother. The Hospice Dr tells me she did say yes she would take it thinking it was medicine to help her breath better but the Nurse told her it was Roxanol. which is geriatric name for Morphine and which my mother had no idea of that when she said yes. I was angry! I told them that i was dead set against Morphine as my mother was and that my sister had no right to even give them the ok to give it to her. My mother passed away less than 10 hours after they gave her Morphine. Another thing Hospice nurses will tell patients and their families it's not the Morphine that kills the patient but they are so certain when a Patient is about to die it's just the timing when they start Morphine. Which I know is just their story like helping to breath better. This goes over great for those people that don't know much about medicine. I know pretty sure my Grandmother and my mother especially was not at that point to die. Mostly with my mother since they were told my mother was allergic and did not want it at all. My Sister, the Nurse and Dr all know they did a dirty thing and are so wrong! I will never trust Hospice or any other "medical professional again". And oh yeah I can't even say anything good about the home care that came 3 times a week. Over that month she only had to bed bath her once that I didn't already have her dressed by the time she showed up at 2 and 3pm. But every time she arrived she complained how busy she had been all day or every time I would ask if she could maybe come the following friday in the Morning because I had a Dr's appointment she would tell me NO that most of her other patients were way more sick than my mother. But funny according to her my mother wasn't that sick but was gone in a month.

my mom is in the last stage of alzheimers and currently has bronchitis. Almost overnight she has gone from taking care of herself (dressing, walking, talking, eating) to not even being able to stand or walk. For about 24 hours she couldn't speak, but is talking more now.
She still cant walk, her feet just won't move. She is now totaly incontinent. will she get better when the bronchitis is over. I am at a complete loss as to what to do. I want to keep her home (my 92 year old dad is at home)Is it time for hospice? She went downhill almost overnight, is it temporary.

Our family has been blessed by hospice twice. First with my dad and later with a close friend. My dad was cared for at home while our friend was already living in a care facility. In both cases, hospice was a wonderful help and we are so appreciative of all involved and of the program itself.

I was interested to learn from this article that families can request hospice if their doctor's haven't already suggested it. I also wanted to share that we discovered that, in some states if not all, if a person is put on hospice, it's often for a set time. However, if they do better than expected and the time period ends, their hospice time can be extended. Be sure to ask your hospice social worker or other staff if that is the case for your family.

And again, a big thank you to everyone involved with hospice.

I've seen hospice in action twice in the last two years. Both times they were wonderful caring people, who's only goal was to make the person dying more comfortable and help them any way they could. My mother-in-law kept her head in the sand about her husband's future imminent dying, and we were unable to tell her. Finally it was the hospice nurse, just a day before he died, that asked her if she wanted to know the truth. She said yes, then the nurse told her that my m-i-l's husband had maybe a day or two to live. My m-i-l was SO mad at that woman, that she was beside herself. But it had to be done, and we were too chicken to do it. But because she was told of his imminent death, she and I were there the night he finally took his last breath. If hospice hadn't gotten truthful with her, she would forever kick herself for NOT being with him when he died. It was awful watching his breathing getting more ragged because of the fluid in his lungs, but I am really glad I was with her that night.

Through the years so many people said Don't call hospice they will kill your mom. NOT! Hospice saved me so much money on supplies. THey shared there knowledge on cargiving, they were supportive, they could reach the doctor faster than I could. and most of all they loved my mother so much. My mom was on hospice for 6 months and she wasn't suppose to live 3 months. They never administered any medication I did as needed. They paid for her monthly meds all of them. They were so wonderful. They cared and gave me so many tips on how to care for my mother to make it easier on me and her. Showed me how to turn her without struggling so much and if I was exhausted they would come help me when I asked. Don't be afraid of hospice when you know your loved one has lived the fullest life possible and needs to be loved and comfortable. You do not have to give them all the pain meds that some people do. You know your loved one better than anyone and you will know when they are in pain or if they are yelling for attention. Listen to your heart and be there for them. Your can ask hospice for all your needs they will help.