Where can I take my 98-year-old mom for a little trip?

You are a very kind kid. So how about some sort of musical concert?

Best to you. And such a thoughtful question. And let us know what you choose.

After my dad died, my sister and her two daughters and I took my mom on a road trip to places she had lived when she was first married. We had a great time. We stayed in small towns with small motels with handicap rooms. Went to where she was born, where she started school. To cemeteries.
We were in this one town where they had named a road for a woman who kept old folks back in the 30s. This woman didn’t treat them very nice my mom said. She thought it was awful that the woman had been honored. She said “You know there is not one person I could tell about this. They are all gone.”
All the people who could really appreciate this news had already died. She was in her early 90s and still in pretty good shape. She loved to travel. My nieces took her and my sister on a couple of other trips the next few years. I was working and didn’t go with but enjoyed hearing all about who they saw and what they did. Of course they made a lot of photos and then had fun scrapbooking for her to look through.
So if your mom had to move away from an earlier life she might enjoy seeing old haunts.
Oh and my mom loved presidential libraries. There were several of us in a large SUV so that would have been easier for us than for you with just you and your mom. But It’s a great idea to travel with your mom regardless of where you go.

Have you asked your Mum if she wants to go on a trip? You say her vision is almost gone and she does little but watch TV all day. How is she going to 'see' the change in scenery?

If going out for lunch is as much as she can handle how would she manage a flight? Think of the lines ups to check in, clear security, the wait for take off and the confusion and congestion of landing, finding bags etc. I know my Dad who flew on long haul international flights up until age 83, could not manage a short flight now. Heck getting from the car to the terminal would exhaust him.

Now for a car trip, how long can she sit comfortably in the car? Does she have any issues with incontinence? Going out for lunch is one thing, but what about going out from breakfast lunch and dinner? You say going out for lunch wipes her out, how can she manage more than that?

Dad will be 90 in a couple weeks. He can manage one activity per day. And he has to rest the next day. So he could go to the doctor on Monday, rest of Tuesday, get groceries on Wednesday, rest on Thursday etc. He has to do his activities in the morning and he will be in bed most the day after he gets home.

I am curious why you panned a cruise or resort? I know of seniors in wheel chairs that do both and have a great time.

Why not a cruise? So many new and delicious foods. Shows. Everything built into the price. Easy access to a place to rest (her room). Use wheelchairs to keep tiredness down. Candi

Definitely, a sweet, positive query! Michigan to Florida sounds like much more than a little trip.
Day trips are a good starting point, and you don't get into the hotel/bathroom situation. Is there an aide or another family member who can assist you? I find it's better with two, as it's almost impossible to watch someone every single minute. At some point, you need to visit the ladies room, too.
Do you yourself need a vacation. If so, is there someone else who could stay with her while you go away?
Back to day trips. Because of her vision and mobility, I would also think about music and nature (ocean, lake, flowers, trees), if that's something she enjoys. The Upper Peninsula is beautiful. That's a beautiful place to visit, it's quiet. There must be a lot to do in Michigan. Even a picnic in the car can be welcome.
If you are ready to go further, what about Niagara Falls?
If not a cruise, is she up for a boat trip on a lake or river? Or one that is guided by a naturalist? What about a day trip on a bus, with a guide?
Are there any Senior day trips available in your area, which would be customized her to age group, and also provide possible opportunities to converse with other elders?

My dad is 81. He is only interested in places from his past. May be an idea.

Weather permitting, try the nearby park or somewhere close by to see how you two manage together for a short trip.

I don't know why you say a cruise is out of the question. Cruises are excellent for seniors. You can do as little or as much as you want. Everything is provided for and like someone mentioned, they provide wheelchairs and also you would get priority seating, boarding and unboarding, etc. If you get a stateroom with a balcony, imagine the fresh air and beautiful sunrises and sunsets. A short 3 or 4 day cruise may be perfect. Did I mention there is 24 hour room service too if you really didn't want to leave your room and just catch up on rest? Some cruise lines cater more to seniors than others, you probably wouldn't want a "party" ship. I wish you well and am sure you will find a great trip for the two of you.

My mother and I love cats, so once a month we went to the SPCA to pet cats. They had separate rooms with about seven cats in each room. I would check around until I found a cat in each room that enjoys sitting on someone’s lap. It was a treat for the cats because they got loving attention for a little while and a treat for us petting the cats.

Bobbi...One of my favorite places is the Grand Hotel on Mackinac Island right in your state. You and your mom could just relax at the hotel. No motorized vehicles are allowed on the island, and so you would have to take a carriage into the little town, etc.. Have you seen the movie “Somewhere in Time”? If not, watch it. It was filmed at the hotel and other parts of the island and will give you a feel for the area. I would recommend going for the Lilac Festival June 7 - 16. You can make reservations on the internet, and I would suggest doing so now: www.grandhotel.com. You would leave your car on the mainland and take a ferry to the island, and a carriage will take you to the hotel. Spend time on the website, and you can see all they have. Things slow down at Mackinac Island, so perhaps it would be a good fit for your mom. I wish you all the best.

My suggestion, is tiny little trips around where you live. Just part of a day" get a ways". I live in Los Angeles and we took a lady friend in her 80's who was almost blind, but could walk to a wonderful museum. She couldn't see the art work, unless up real close. But the view museum was great, a wonderful patio, etc. She really liked being out. Lot's of tiny trips & experiences have value. For me just going to a bakery (which I love) and enjoying the bakery experience means a great deal. Small gems have great value.

How about Disney World? Pick an off season, ( plenty of tour books iir some specifically aimed toward seniors) . Epcot is very interesting for adults ,as is the Animal kingdom, the hotels on the property are beautiful, have activities at them as well or just relax . You can tell them about mobility issues and rent wheelchairs. Most of the less “thrill type” rides accommodate wheelchairs . My parents went when they were close to 80 and loved it.

Have you checked your area's office on aging for senior-friendly events? I don't know that they'd give the info out for free but if you have assisted living facilities in your area, call their activities director and see what outings they do. Maybe live, local theater productions, or concerts as someone else mentioned would work. Not the big stadium productions, but there are probably local venues with jazz musicians, acoustic performances and what not. Check out your area's arts scene. Arts aren't always visual. And I love the suggestion of visiting an animal shelter and just comforting the pets awaiting adoption. That's a great idea. When your weather settles down, a nice picnic would be a change of pace.

As for cruises, I live in Fla and I'm shocked at how many seniors flock to them! Perhaps not as "senior" as 98 but still. In Michigan, are river cruises available? It would be difficult to fly across country to get to a cruise ship port. What about a short nostalgic train ride? The feel of movement is exhilarating. Something hypnotic about trains. You are very lucky she's still up for such things.

Paddle boats cruises on the Mississippi. When was the last time she went to the movies? You say her eyesight is almost gone, but some theaters show the classics from the 1930s and 1940s. She knows those movies and the smell and taste of popcorn and the dialog from Casablanca, for example might be enjoyable. Visiting a resort on the ocean brings the sun and wonder smell of salt air. If she likes to recount stories from her life, day visits to special places from her life will rekindle those memories (bring a tape recorder!). My daughter and mother had a standing date at the salon for mani/pedis; the technicians were very respectful and caring toward my mother in her advanced age. (She had no medical issues preventing her from partaking of this pleasure.) I doubled the fun by buying her Uggs shearling boots to slip on after; no toenail polish for her! I've never done it, but what about train excursions? Anybody out there know more about that?

Little trips can be local and only last a couple of hours. My mother enjoys going to nearby parks where she enjoys the scenery and watches the kids play. Sometimes we take a picnic lunch. She tags along when I take her great-grandson to the play ground or pool. In fact, Mom enjoys just riding along when I run short errands. She doesn't like to get out of the car and enter the stores much anymore so I have to make sure the weather is appropriate if she's going to wait in the car while I run in for 10-15 minutes. Often I just visit pick-ups or drive through windows when I take her along. We go by Walmart/other chain to pickup an grocery order and then stop at the Dairy Queen for a milk shake on the way home. Sometimes we just drive through the community she grew up in or past some building site that's been in the paper recently.

My Aunt is in mid stages of dementia and has trouble walking long distances. They took her ona 3 day cruise and hired a wheelchair for long walks.

No flying. If Mom can’t handle much more than a lunch out, navigating airports and narrow airplane aisles is out of the question.

Driving only. Keep it within 60-90 minutes of home, unless you two have a long, long history of harmonious car trips together. (And even if you do, age 98 + severe physical limitations is a whole different ballgame.)

Rent a big van or something more comfy/roomy for Mom, if need be. Heck, it’s only one day!

Are you close-ish to any of the adorable towns along Lake Michigan or Lake Huron? Any scenic state parks within a reasonable drive of where you live?

Keep in mind: Making things harder for yourself does not equal making it more special for Mom.

Don’t get so wrapped up in second-guessing Mom’s bucket list (or creating expectations) that it’s impossible for you to enjoy yourself.

You’ll have the memory of this trip longer than Mom will. Keep the stress level low. You don’t need a grand scale to have a lovely outing. 😃

IF she is agreeable to allowing a wheelchair, that might make for more options, but then it might also be massive exhaustion for you as the pusher. Wheelchairs at the airport etc can allow her to easily get to the gate, and once you are for instance at a place like Disney, then you can plan accordingly and pace it slow. Much of your ease would depend on thorough planning ahead to make sure of accommodations close to elevators, transportation options, wheelchair availability, if you want to push. With a wheelchair a big hotel would not be out of the question I would think...Is Niagara Falls feasible? To get up close there would be walking...but I know of one hotel where the rooms facing the falls had doors that opened (there is a gate to prevent falls) and you can hear the falls and feel the positive ions...

"glamping" my 93 year old mom enjoys (we think) camping in a cabin (if you are close to ohio, we have some great campsites). she can be outside with family, enjoy nature and still have an indoor bathroom and bed (and tv)

Mackinac island ? Town with nice motel and restaurant nearby ? Walk-thru garden area or museum with wheelchair ?

If your mother like sight seeing, maybe take her to an IMAX theater when there are nature shows in 3D. Check out the science centers near you. The one near me has a huge screen, 7-story tall, and there are wonderful shows about space, forests, Egypt, etc. You feel like you're there in movie even when it's just 2D.

I think you may want to consider buying one of the lightweight wheelchairs(Walgreens) that you push. It's easier to get in/out of a vehicle. If you stay overnight, always ask for a handicapped room. When dad was able, we would catch a movie during the matinee time every week. It wasn't about the movie, but the popcorn & drink. We would go on picnics, too. The most memorable event that I took Dad to, was Cirque du Soleil. Because of the wheelchair, we were able to get a front seat. Some of the characters came up to Dad, he laughed alot & we got some incredible pictures that will last a lifetime.

I believe one guide would be knowing what your mother has enjoyed in the past, and perhaps asking her to see what she would enjoy. She might get bored going to events, places or activities that never would have interested her before, particularly as she still has her mental abilities intact. The chances are that there are some easier versions of the things she used to enjoy.

That is very sweet of you. She is very blessed to still be up and going. Is she against using a wheelchair? I am not from your area. I'd always love the idea to take my grandma to national parks for a "stroll" but her dementia gives her too much anxiety. It's nice to see and hear trees, lakes, animals, green hills etc. Of course assuming there is a paved road where you can push a wheelchair. Does she like animals? You can take her to a horse eventing show. Or to a local museum if you want to keep it quiet and simple. Florida? The beach! It's never a bad idea to go to the beach on a sunny warm day.

What about the Zoo? When it gets warmer in your neck of the woods, of course.

Just throwing some more ideas out.
A botanical garden local to you? Do any of your high schools or colleges put on good musicals?

I used to take my mother out for a ‘walking pace drive’. We found a road in the hills near us that had great scenery and almost no traffic. I would drive at the slowest speed the car would do, all windows down and right next to the road side, with frequent stops. It was the best alternative we had to going for a walk, and it was very easy to do regularly. We both enjoyed it, and also the chat that went with it.

As was mentioned, botanical gardens are nice. There are the smells as well as the sights. Some even have herb gardens and such designed for smell. If you have a public attraction that sounds interesting to you, check and see if they have wheelchairs available.

Actually on a nice spring day, even a landscape nursery can be nice to visit.

With help, could she get in and out of a carriage? For example a horse drawn carriage ride?

You know, maybe renting a limo with chauffeur, and going on a narrated history of your area is a possibility too.