My sister is threatening me with court over Mom. Advice?

I would add acouple things.
1. Find the sale date of the house and any eviction. Also, locate any doctor visits on or about that time within 6 mo prior. If dr diagnosed cognitive impairment, early dementia, etc.; then you would have proof that sis took advantage of the estate.
2. You have POA, so you are in the clear. You have plenty of substantiation for the care you have provided since eviction.
3. Use this documentation should you be called to court.
4. I wouldn't hire a lawyer as this is a ridiculous suit and in my mind, your sis just got an attorney to send you a scary lawyer letter meant to scare you.

A judge will likely throw this out of court or have an independent evaluation if your mothers health or assets are believed to be at risk under your care.

Honor your sisters request to not communicate with her directly. You might want to bait her with a calendar and have her pick all her visitation dates and times. Hopefully, you can accommodate most of them, then hold sis to them...if she misses, changes, etc...document it and take it to court with you.

2000, it may be helpful to find out the sale price of the house. This is a matter of public record in the County where the house is located. Check the Clerk and Recorder website it may be available online. Any encumbrance on the house would be a recorded document. Another check of the Building Department may show any permits pulled by address.

Jessiebelle, I understand your calculations in the house sale explanation, but I still see a problem. If the house is sold for 150K after sis and mom each put in 100K and then sis added 30K of improvements, why does sis get all of her investment back after commissions and closing costs are paid and mom gets nothing? Seem to me that the net proceeds (100K after sales costs and the 30K of improvements) should have been shared.

akdaughter, there was some sort of mortgage on the house, but the amount is not clear nor is 2000 sure if she was paying on it. Now in 2007 home values were high, but they seriously crashed in 2009 and in many places are still down. Add the cost of improvements e.g. a roof and a kitchen or bath upgrade and bingo, you lose your axx.

Yeah, Pam, I agree that there is a lot of missing info here. There may not have been any net proceeds (or profit) at all. I was just asking for a clarification if the facts are as stated in Jessie's example. If I follow it correctly, it looks like sis pocketed 100K after the improvements and selling costs were paid, and mom got nothing. If so, it would seem to be fraud. This is probably a good example of the problems of joint ownership.
It sounds like sq2000 is doing all of the work, and, like so many of us, is being bullied. I am changing my POA to include payment for services to whichever child ends up with the short straw. My POA for my mom specifically prohibits payment for services in an attempt to placate my bully brother, but it hasn't helped. If I had only known then what I know now. At least some payment for the time spent would help to reduce resentment.

I have been through something similar. I don't know what state you live in, but there is a district attorney in each county. Ask to be directed to the Elder Abuse department. Do this while your mom is still alive. I wish I had known to go there before my mom passed 2 years ago. I would start there. It's free. Take all of your paperwork and as much proof as possible, including photos and videos. This is a criminal offense and you must be your mom's advocate. She doesn't have anyone else to speak for her or take care of her at this point of her life. Get everyone's business card, and take notes for future references. One other thing that you may want to do, is contact the law departments of colleges and universities in your area. These lawyers that charge enormous fees, also teach at these places. Sometimes they are willing to meet with you, guide you, or direct their legal assistant to do something to help you. But most importantly, don't sit back and be passive.

I would also be curious as to why the sister now wants contact with mother. It is a cold cruel world and anyone can take out an insurance policy on an individual. I say this because you mentioned that your mom becomes stressed/upset when your sister visits. What could be her motivation in visiting? Guilt, repentance or more financial gain?

*They are unhappy with my terms of visitation*.... Your sister has every right to see your her Mother so what's your problem?

Perhaps you need a mediator to look at this case objectively. Your Mom has a right to see your sister and you're in the way.

lilyat - You aren't helping, you are judging, possibly from your own experience. Please read the original post.