My mom has severe skin cancer with wounds that must be dressed and bandaged daily. She pulls them off constantly. What can I do?

First, bless you for the care you are providing.

Secondly, I would aim at addressing the reason she is pulling off the bandages. Have you ever had an itch and couldn't scratch it? Ugh. To make it harder to relieve her discomfort is a solution of you, but not really for her immediate needs. What is her discomfort? Is she allergic to the bandages? Is the drainage irritating?

Talk to a wound doctor or nurse. Perhaps try Medihoney, as someone else suggested.

My sister had this, except it was the entire right side of her chest. Hospice provided a cream that stopped the drainage and weeping of the massive wound.

I would ask them for guidance on what you can use to stop the irritation from the fluids. Maybe some mittens overnight can help with her dexterity getting the bandaids off.

May The Lord touch both of you and make this final journey together as peaceful as it can be.

I just want to say that sounds SO difficult. My dad has dementia, is in home hospice, and also has multiple areas of skin cancer that he picks at, but so far, no draining, bleeding, or need for dressings.

I really feel for you!

Lwayne: Pose your question to your mother's hospice nurse.

You could try those elastic wraps over your bandage, they sell them to wrap horses, they might be harder for her to get off. They come in colors maybe tell her thats for pretty. Or put those clear patches on top that seal everything. I use them in top of my husbands bedsore bandages

Had similar issue on hub with his upper arm . As a retired nurse I used a few tricks .. I hit the dollar store and in addition to gauze to wrap I bought the stuff I call coban it resembles an acewrap but sticks on itself. After changing dressing I wrapped gauze tighter and but self sticking bandage on last I got him to wear a tighter sleeve shirt too so he had to move more to get to it but when he tried it was harder to grab the self stick stuff and when he did I could hear the ripping sound . It helped save my sanity. If the area is more in chest can do similar with the larger self stick that can be found in sporting area or ordered. In the hospital we also used abdominal binders some have Velcro some have buckles like the kind to support backs. Even a bra with back clasp can help . We are at stage now in our journey that we no longer do procedures that will not help or change outcome. Our objective is safety and love and making the most of what time we have left. Being a caregiver is the hardest thing I’ve had to do and I would encourage you to get support with a caregiver group and counseling and put yourself first because without you taking care of yourself you do your loved one no good. We caregivers all know the feeling of frustration oh too well and I have connected with wonderful individuals and we support each other. Praying you too can find others to relate to … you are not alone🙏🏻

I can’t imagine how difficult this must be for you. I wish you all the best. You’re an amazing daughter.

HAve you tried Tegaderm? It's not so easy to remove.

Have you heard of Medihoney?

My aunt used it on a wound that would not heal and it was amazing how well it worked. https://www.shopwoundcare.com/b-medihoney.html.

She would also wrap it sometimes with Guaze bandages for extra comfort and to stop any leakage from the draining/bleeding. https://www.shopwoundcare.com/c-conforming-bandages.html

It helped relieve a lot of the discomfort she was having.

I had the same problem when my mom was with us. I bought a cheap package of ladies knee high nylons at Walmart. Then I cut off the toe of the nylons. After doing the dressings I would gently put the knee high onto her arm over the dressing. It was very light and non restricting. Then she always wore long sleeve tops.
Hope this helps.

* Could you ask MD if she can be provided a mild sedative?
* I believe it is (partially caused by) anxiety, boredom.
* Perhaps use 'more aggressive' tape so not as easy to pull off.
* Give her something else to fiddle with -
* I am a massage practitioner; I have used liquid bandaids - although this might not work for a larger area. This is good though for small abrasions/cuts on my fingers. Really helped me when doing a massage and not emcumbered with a band-aid.

Gena / Touch Matters

Pulling in hospice is probably a good idea. Close fitting long sleeve and long pant under garment over the dressings might help keep them out of sight during the night. They might hurt or itch while she is trying to rest...hospice can give her something for that as well.

You have excellent advice below.
It is time now for hospice guidance, and for medication that will prevent the itching and pain that is causing this distress and pulling at the dressings. I know you are likely using already stockinette? Consider so mildly compressing cotton spandex garments over the dressings.

You are now looking for comfort only and a blessed deliverance from a torment even a Saint couldn't endure. Please be certain medication is on board even IF it does hasten death by some minutes, hours, days or even weeks.

It was observed below that pain medications required can increase itching. Important you discuss this with Hospice. Hopefully hiring an aid will not be required, but it may be.

What does the Hospice Nurse say.

Opiates increase the itching response. Add benedryl.

You may have to hire a night-time aide(with moms money)to come sit with her and keep an eye on her, or increase her pain meds to the point that they knock her out overnight.
This sounds like it is WAY to much for just one person anyway, so hiring someone for overnight will allow you a goods night sleep and will prevent your mom from pulling off the bandages.

Consider that she may be picking at her wounds because they hurt and try increasing her pain meds, at this point I imagine being totally sedated would be a blessing.

If the wounds are on her torso then consider anti-strip clothing (Silverts.com is one supplier of "adaptive" clothing).

https://www.silverts.com/all-adaptive/pants/alzheimer-s-jumpsuits

If the wounds are on her extremities...
- cut her nails very short or put on short, fake nails which make successful picking almost impossible.
- put NexCare waterproof bandaids on each fingertip
- have her wear Tencel or non-latex gloves (tight-fitting so she can't get them off)
- make sure the wounds aren't itchy, which can trigger the picking; keep her skin well hydrated. Make sure she isn't allergic to the bandages (latex)
- meds for excoriation disorder (compulsive picking) "memantine" has shown effectiveness; CBD
- compression socks if the wounds are on her legs
- provide her a fidget toy or blanket